5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

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5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby NotCIAAgent » Fri Feb 06, 2015 11:35 am

Who is the most evil person in history? A mass murderer? A rapist? Aunt Martha, who stole your Care Bear collection and threw them at the fire because they were satanic and those colorful things are for gays anyway, when you were just an innocent, 32 year old boy?

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If dressing as Cheer to go to a kids park means to be pedo homo, I don't want to be hetero.


Most of you are going to say Adolf Hitler, the German Dictator who... do I really need tell you who in the hell Adolf Hitler was? If I do, go play some Wolfenstein 3D, he is the guy in robot armor with two Gatling guns.

Thing is, I think Hitler is a bit underrated, he wasn't such a bad guy. Those who didn't sleep through history class might say, "But he killed 6 million Jews!", to which I would normally reply "But he killed 6 million Jews!" But one encounter with the Mossad is enough for one lifetime, I will avoid kicking this horse and present real actual arguments.

1 - He and his party introduced a completely new view on animal welfare!

Before Nazi Germany, the animal welfare laws weren't really protecting the interest of the animals, but of the owners. The Fuhrer changed that. The Nazis prohibited trapping, imposed severe restrictions on hunting, and enforced the protection of pets and husbandry. Finally, they also banned Kosher slaughtering, which is a Jewish practice of killing an animal in the most painful way possible without even stunning the poor thing, because we all know Jews feed on suffering.

Even on the personal level, Hitler was an animal person, having a dog called Blondie and being a vegetarian. He also loved all animals except, as history showed us, one:

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He really wasn't a cat person.


2 - He was a war hero!

Adolfie (Alfie? Dolfie? How you make the name Adolf cute?) volunteered to serve in the First World War in a Bavarian regiment. In his time, he gained an Iron Cross Second Class for bravery, Iron Cross First Class (awarded by his Jewish superior), and the Black Wound Badge when he was injured, near the end of his military career and the war. Back then, when officers didn't use medals as a bullet proof vest, those three meant a lot. Why isn't this guy an American action movie hero yet?

Because he wasn't a front-line soldier, he was a dispatch runner. People even question if he actually fired his rifle against the enemy at any time during the war. This tested claims of his valiant battle feats described in various Nazi-era newspapers, biographies and books. What are the odds of this guy lying?

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Here, seen doing some vanity shots. Only a self confident man would look that ridiculous in front of a camera.


3 - He was a sensible painter!


Image


Look at this. Just look at this! Those traces, those colors! It is a well spread myth that Hitler was a bad painter and, for that, was kicked out of the academy in Vienna. But really, if if this isn't a Picasso, at least I could very well picture something like that in a postcard. Also, have in mind this was done in 1914, he was practically a boy!

Hitler was a truly sensitive boy, the kind that would make any girl's heart melt down like butter in a oven pan. What else could you ask, ladies? We all know, no bad guys or psychopaths have artistic tastes or talent. Right?

4 - He was inevitable.

One pretty common science fiction plot is the one of going back in time to kill Hitler before WW2, in hopes of avoiding the war and the holocaust before it even happened. You see this played straight in Command & Conquer: Red Alert, and to some degree in shows like Star Trek. What they usually ignore (either the writers, or the characters partaking on the quest for Hitler's corpse) is that if he fell, another would rise.

Germany was absolutely destroyed by the conclusion of a war they were dragged into over Imperial alliances. If WW1 is a clusterfuck for us, with access to the internet, imagine for the average German citizen. Too many died, they lost territory in excessive reparations, and their economy was broken. This, plus the Reds rising in the East, created a paranoia and vengeance atmosphere perfect for nationalistic leaders to rise. Would someone else have been better than Hitler? Worse? We will never know. Until we find how to shoot through time, that is.

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I am scared, and my country once managed to get to 4000%. Imagine if you were living there now.


5 - He showed the West the horror that is an industrial scale genocide system.

Up to 15 thousand homosexuals. Up to 2 thousand Catholic priests. Half a million Serbs. Almost the entirety of the Romani. 6 million Jews. Racial hostilities have been very common throughout history among various peoples on the face of Earth, with violent solutions being employed with certain frequency, and even gusto. Races would be blamed for problems within a nation, radical measures would be taken, and sometimes, someone would suggest "but what if we just killed/deported all of them?"

Possibly for the first time, in a place where all the world could see, someone did it. The West was shocked. Speechless. Someone actually did it. And it looked horrible. Concentration camps, forced labor, ghettos, races almost annihilated for being different.

This is, in my opinion, by far, the greatest contribution the Nazis left the world. This terrible scar that will never heal, showing us how low humanity can go in the name of hatred. Maybe we could have learned without it? Maybe. But we would never have this clear example of ethnic cleansing in the modern era of media and radio and, I am afraid, it would still be a discussion-worthy argument in most places. It could happen later. It could happen worse, with the technology of tracking, drones and etc.

I don't ask anyone to be thankful for the tragedy that happened. What I do ask is to be thankful that it happened in the past, not in the present, and hopefully, with the example to always be remembered, not in the future.

tl/dr: Hitler did nothing wrong. Become a Nazi today.

Image credits: Cat image by Aothecat via wikimedia commons
Title image via Bundesarchiv, Bild 101I-808-1238-05
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby Tesseracts » Fri Feb 06, 2015 3:01 pm

Oh, good. So I didn't do anything wrong when I did this.

Der Fuhrer.png


Phew.

I also created Mars. And I created a dumb little website that apparently publishes pro-Nazi propaganda. Vote for me.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby NotCIAAgent » Fri Feb 06, 2015 3:18 pm

Whoever posts a holocaust joke gets a golden star!

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Edit:

Moderator: aviel

I couldn't come up with this.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby Ericthebearjew » Fri Feb 06, 2015 3:36 pm

*Hits NotCIAAgent with a bat*
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby Edgar Cabrera » Fri Feb 06, 2015 4:20 pm

Wait, not mauling? Eric?

My goodness, you must be serious.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby Matthew Notch » Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:48 pm

NotCIAAgent wrote:This is, in my opinion, by far, the greatest contribution the Nazis left the world. This terrible scar that will never heal, showing us how low humanity can go in the name of hatred. Maybe we could have learned without it? Maybe. But we would never have this clear example of ethnic cleansing in the modern era of media and radio and, I am afraid, it would still be a discussion-worthy argument in most places. It could happen later. It could happen worse, with the technology of tracking, drones and etc.


I'm not at all unsure that it won't, for some, become a discussion-worthy argument to many people in the near future. It's not as though all genocide has begun and ended with the Holocaust. The Rwandan genocide, the Srebrenica massacre, just to name just a couple off the top of my head, and I'm not even as into history as you jokers are, but anyway those came long after Hitler showed people how to really get in there and exterminate a whole race. And we might think such a dialog may never come into the consciousness of the more "enlightened" nations, but I don't believe that for a second. That perfect storm of circumstance and political opportunism can strike anywhere without prejudice, and in a relatively short time the tide of public opinion can be turned, seemingly by magic. We go from "Hitler did something terrible, let's all be better than that" to "Hitler did a terrible job, let's all do better than that". And like you say, the potential for even greater catastrophe is in place with the rise of advanced military technology.

I would certainly agree that the majority of the world has learned a lesson from the atrocities committed in Nazi Germany, but I am reticent to agree that it's a lesson we've learned definitively as a result of the sheer enormity involved in teaching it to us. People who learn things the hard way, or even the very very hard way, still sometimes revert back to their old ways.

But you are right, Hitler was a heck of a painter.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby NotCIAAgent » Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:53 pm

Look at it like that: at least we are no longer as keen on murdering members of our nations, already integrated in our society, as we (hopefully) were to kill natives and colonials.

Progress! ... kinda.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby EstebanColberto » Fri Feb 06, 2015 6:11 pm

I would like to think that the Holocaust is an example other people to look back on and remind them of why genocide is bad, but then I think of all the people I know who think the solution to all the strife in the Middle East is to get rid of all of the Muslims. It's easy to justify genocide once you've stopped thinking of the targets of your ethnic cleansing are fellow human beings. Funny thing is these people I know who think this way also think Hitler is worst evil mankind has ever seen and believe this cause of the mass killing of an entire group of people based on their ethnicity and religion and none of them see the irony in this.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby Marcuse » Fri Feb 06, 2015 6:22 pm

While genocide itself predates, and postdates the holocaust, at no other point in history has an organisation embarked on the systematic, planned and deliberately industrialised killing of an ethnic group. It's the planned and industrial character of the killing that is what has never been repeated. While the genocide in Rwanda was terrible, it was conducted in an ad hoc fashion, with gangs targeting Tutsis as part of a wave of racial tension. By contrast, there was no real actual tension between German Jews and the Nazis, the Nazi government just rounded everyone up, sent them to camps where they were killed. There wasn't any wiggle room about that, you just died.

It's a difficult thing to define, but it's sort of the difference between being angry and killing someone, and planning their demise. The latter is more disturbing because it's coldly calculated.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby aviel » Fri Feb 06, 2015 7:55 pm

EstebanColberto wrote:I would like to think that the Holocaust is an example other people to look back on and remind them of why genocide is bad, but then I think of all the people I know who think the solution to all the strife in the Middle East is to get rid of all of the Muslims.

More ridiculously, I've heard many suggestions that the solution is to get rid of all the Jews. Because that's consistently worked in the past, right?

Humans always do the right thing having exhausted every other option. Hitler demonstrated that killing the Jews wasn't the solution; maybe we can try something else.

Marcuse wrote:It's a difficult thing to define, but it's sort of the difference between being angry and killing someone, and planning their demise. The latter is more disturbing because it's coldly calculated.
Arguably, the former is more disturbing because the brutality is more exaggerated and public; it is much more difficult to hide behind the banality of evil.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby EstebanColberto » Sat Feb 07, 2015 1:22 am

Marcuse wrote:While genocide itself predates, and postdates the holocaust, at no other point in history has an organisation embarked on the systematic, planned and deliberately industrialised killing of an ethnic group.


While not exactly directed at an ethnic group, nor was it done for the same reasons Hitler did it, the Mongols led by Genghis Kahn and his sons and grandsons and great grandsons was pretty systematic and pretty horrific. If you didn't surrender, then they'd slaughter the entire town. They allowed individuals to flee to the Mongols, but all that guaranteed you was that you would be fighting on the frontlines filling in the moats and scaling the walls of your hometown while the Kahn's elite troops sat back in reserve. Once a town was taken, they would systematically kill everyone in ways that mirrored the holocaust, and I do mean everyone. The only reason this isn't specifically viewed as genocide by historians is cause the goal wasn't to kill off an entire race and supplant them with Mongols. The Kahns didn't really care if the people they ruled were different than them. They did it to scare their neighbors into submission so that entire cities would surrender to them without a fight once the rumors spread about what they've done.
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Re: 5 Reasons Hitler is Underrated

Postby 52xMax » Sat Feb 07, 2015 6:18 am

Well, it is true, Adolf Hitler was no Mother Teresa

He was still pretty bad, though.

And at least he was a mediocre/decent painter. Mother Teresa couldn't paint for shit.
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