Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering school.

Polls everywhere, but not a single dancer. Intelligence optional.

Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby CarrieVS » Wed Nov 18, 2015 2:53 pm

Jbob, it's not nice to try and get Kiv killed.
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A Combustible Lemon wrote:Death is an archaic concept for simpleminded commonfolk, not Victorian scientist whales.
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby cmsellers » Wed Nov 18, 2015 4:24 pm

CarrieVS wrote:Jbob, it's not nice to try and get Kiv killed.

He's not trying to kill her; he's trying to make her stronger.
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby jbobsully11 » Wed Nov 18, 2015 7:39 pm

CarrieVS wrote:Jbob, it's not nice to try and get Kiv killed.

The internet tells me you'd have to be falling at a minimum speed of 12.5 m/s to die; a second-story window (even if the first floor was somewhat tall) isn't nearly high enough to kill you (unless you land on your head and/or in a pit of knives).

Although that could make some awesome horrible 100-level physics questions...
  • 13

Crimson847 wrote:In other words, transgender-friendly privacy laws don't molest people, people molest people.

(Presumably, the only way to stop a bad guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law is a good guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law, and thus transgender-friendly privacy law rights need to be enshrined in the Constitution as well)
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby Twistappel » Mon Nov 23, 2015 11:06 pm

Kivutar wrote:8. Not allowed to get caught eating in a Level II Biohazard lab.

Does this work the same way as ancient Sparta: You're not being punished for doing it, you're being punished for getting caught.
  • 12

You say "New World Order" "communist echo chamber" like it's a bad thing.

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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby Kivutar » Fri Mar 03, 2017 12:18 am

Since I just filled out my Intent to Graduate form (Whooo! also, late!), I thought I'd update y'all on what I've been up to.

37. Not allowed to play volleyball in the lab.
38. Not allowed to ignore protocol, even if that protocol is “You must wear a cowboy hat at all times.” (Seriously, there was lab with that rule).
39. I am allowed to bribe the office staff with cookies. They are delicious.
40. Not allowed to autoclave solvents-must put in fume hood. Not allowed to put plant fungi in fume hood-must use autoclave. If I was trying to extract anything from plant fungi with solvents, God help me.
41. Not allowed to snicker at the existence of butt connectors.
42. Not allowed to editorialize when labeling common-use petri dishes, even if they are horrible.
43. Definitely not allowed to label shipping packages with things that will scare the normals.
44. Not allowed to go elbow-deep in sticky green scrubber waste. If I have already done so, not allowed to let the health and safety committee see me.
45. Not allowed to snicker at the health and safety representative’s Freudian slips.
46. Frogs are not permitted in my supervisor’s office.
47. Not allowed to defrost -80 ˚C glycerol stocks in my cleavage any more, mostly for my own good.
48. Not allowed to allow senior engineers to enter the lab in only their underwear. This may require some tact.
49. “The red stuff” is neither a helpful nor informative label.
50. If talks are held in a classy venue, not permitted to vault over anything.
51. Not allowed to bring an Up-sized bunch of balloons into the lab.
52. Not allowed to breathe helium for purposes of amusement.
53. Not allowed to get classmates' attention by poking them with a replica harpoon.
54. Plastic Easter eggs are not good column packing material.
55. Not allowed to drink alcohol during important presentations, even if it does improve performance.
56. I actually am allowed to satirize the Engineering Society viciously in print, because we have a free press.
57. If I can still operate the nano-drop machine, it doesn’t matter how plastered I am - working in the lab is fine.
58. Stealing nice candy boxes from abandoned sections of the hospital is ok. At least, I didn't get caught.
59. Not allowed to test the sharpness of implements on my skin.
  • 23

Then the LORD said to me, "Go again, love a woman who is loved by her husband, yet an adulteress, even as the LORD loves the sons of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love raisin cakes."

Hosea 3:1
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby Kivutar » Sun Jun 21, 2020 2:57 pm

It's been a long time, hasn't it?

First, the last few from school:

60. Not allowed to create boards of amusing quotes when working for the gubmint, because the gubmint is serious business.
61. Not even if I hide them behind the fridge.
62. Not allowed to criticize my supervisor's "ingenious" ideas, even if they lead to random and sudden sewage explosions.

After a couple of years in the workforce, I've changed and grown wiser. Oh wait. There are several things I am not allowed to do at work, now:

1. The floor is “radioactively contaminated,” not “a bit spicy.”
2. Not allowed to make snowballs out of the frozen moisture on nitrogen dewars.
3. Not allowed to fill out order forms for high explosives. The office staff does not necessarily recognize chemical names, and may actually attempt to order them.
4. Not allowed to wax poetic on paperwork to troll the QA.
5. Not not allowed to wear false mustaches on top of my mask for a solid fortnight. Doesn't hurt anyone.
6. Must remember to take them off before going into a cleanroom, though.
7. Not allowed to keep an open bath of aqua regia, boiling hexane, and a base hydrolysis setup in the same fume hood at the same time.
8. My setup should not blow out the fume hood, the shaker, and an entire block of computers.
9. It is not a competition to accumulate the most mR.
10. How on earth do I lose my pants twice in one week?
11. Not allowed to blast Don Giovanni.
12. Not allowed to counter every Health and Safety rule with "But there's a door we can just walk through and die!"
13. Not allowed to wear World Cup hats while we're being inspected.
14. Social Distancing markings do not need to be placed vertically.
15. Not allowed to respond to reasonable requests with an overly emphatic “No!” New people might think I mean it.
16. The correct way to communicate to and from the production room is the intercom system, and not charades.
17. Not allowed to run blue dye through the autoclave pipes ever again.
18. Not allowed to replace the labels for people’s colour-coded task management pegs with incorrect colours.
19. Not allowed to tell the EHS officer when I get another goddamn needle stick.
20. Not allowed to dumpster dive in the radioactive sharps bin, even if someone threw out my sample.
  • 7

Then the LORD said to me, "Go again, love a woman who is loved by her husband, yet an adulteress, even as the LORD loves the sons of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love raisin cakes."

Hosea 3:1
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby NathanLoiselle » Sun Jun 21, 2020 4:53 pm

I'm hearing a lot of no. But I know you mean yes.
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby jbobsully11 » Mon Jun 22, 2020 10:13 pm

My phone is being obnoxious and I’m too tired/lazy to go to my computer, so I can’t properly quote the line, but regarding #19 in the work list, what? Isn’t that why they’re there? Or, like, is your entire job getting stuck with needles, and they got annoyed at you for going over there every five seconds to say “yep, still doing my job?”
  • 4

Crimson847 wrote:In other words, transgender-friendly privacy laws don't molest people, people molest people.

(Presumably, the only way to stop a bad guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law is a good guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law, and thus transgender-friendly privacy law rights need to be enshrined in the Constitution as well)
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby CarrieVS » Mon Jun 22, 2020 11:08 pm

I would like to hear the story behind #3
  • 4

A Combustible Lemon wrote:Death is an archaic concept for simpleminded commonfolk, not Victorian scientist whales.
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby Kivutar » Tue Jun 23, 2020 12:51 pm

CarrieVS wrote:I would like to hear the story behind #3


What can I say, it was April Fools day and I thought they'd recognize "trinitrotoluene."
  • 4

Then the LORD said to me, "Go again, love a woman who is loved by her husband, yet an adulteress, even as the LORD loves the sons of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love raisin cakes."

Hosea 3:1
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby Kivutar » Tue Jun 23, 2020 12:53 pm

jbobsully11 wrote:My phone is being obnoxious and I’m too tired/lazy to go to my computer, so I can’t properly quote the line, but regarding #19 in the work list, what? Isn’t that why they’re there? Or, like, is your entire job getting stuck with needles, and they got annoyed at you for going over there every five seconds to say “yep, still doing my job?”


It means paperwork.
  • 5

Then the LORD said to me, "Go again, love a woman who is loved by her husband, yet an adulteress, even as the LORD loves the sons of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love raisin cakes."

Hosea 3:1
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Re: Things Kivutar is not allowed to do in engineering schoo

Postby iMURDAu » Tue Jun 23, 2020 10:13 pm

Regarding #14, I believe that social distancing applies in all directions. I didn't see anything restricting those rules when it comes to the airspace above your person. I know you're in a different country but I suggest contacting OSHA anyway.
  • 6

“This is going to become a bad meme,” Todd observed.
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