Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

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Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Cordslash » Fri Oct 14, 2016 6:45 pm

http://www.cracked.com/blog/women-you-will-be-groped-this-what-you-need-to-know/

*reads article*

Well this should be interesting because most decent people are against this kind of thing and it's rarely talked about.

*reads comments*

Ok most people are against this...

*reads more comments*

Some guys are real assholes.

My favourites are the comments from guys saying how "I don't have to apologize or empathise because I don't do this" and of course "get back to funny Cracked, we already have tumblr".

Yes, because you're the victim here.

Although I haven't conducted a poll of all the women I've ever known I'm pretty sure most of them have been groped by a guy at some point in their lives. And saying it's a matter of "boys will be boys" is demeaning to both boys and decent men.

The last time I saw this in public was a little while ago on a flight back from Dubai when a 18 year old boy, who was part of my tour group, sat in the aisle seat in front of me and pinched a flight attendant's butt as she bent over to get someone else a drink from the cart. Her look of shock and disgust was immediate. He of course was looking straight ahead pretending he knew nothing. Big fat joke.
I slapped the kid on the back of his head and told him to apologise. Which he sheepishly did.

Thing is women and girls do get groped, usually in public while they're alone. Men should act on that as much as women should.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby ghijkmnop » Fri Oct 14, 2016 7:08 pm

Redacted
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Tesseracts » Fri Oct 14, 2016 7:29 pm

This article rings hollow for me. I've never been groped, but she makes it sound like it happens to all women. According to her it hasn't happened to me "yet." I have heard unwanted comments on my body though.

Disclaimer: Look, I'm obviously joking about the violence. Just scare the guy off, or restrain him and wait for police or whatever.


This is bad advice. As a child my parents always told me if someone tried to abduct me I should claw their eyes out. Some people might be scared off by yelling but that's not always sufficient for self defense. If someone starts harassing you in any way (physical or verbal) you should react like you would to a wild bear. Be as loud and aggressive as possible until they leave, and if they don't leave I hope you have bear spray.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Cordslash » Fri Oct 14, 2016 7:41 pm

ghijkmnop wrote:I'm saying this here instead of there for obvious reasons:

I have been groped as an adult by men, women, and teenaged girls. Standard response to complaint: "I see your pants; I know you liked it. What--you're gonna cry now, you pussy?"

I know where the statistical majority lies, but would it hurt to craft the article to include women on women groping at least?


You're a musician though, I thought that came with the territory?

Okay, okay, non-joke response: sure it happens to men too. I've been groped by men and women more often than I'd like to think about. Last time was only 2 weeks ago at a barbecue when a young lady (and my friend's daughter!) tried to stick her hand down my pants when we were dancing. Quickly stopped that dance.
And I'm not hot in anyone's books. Still not sure why that happened.

This article is about women though. Not men. There may be a time and place for discussing the double standards etc of men being groped, but I think here we should be gracious enough to have a discussion about the majority issue as discussed in the article.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby ghijkmnop » Fri Oct 14, 2016 7:50 pm

Redacted
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Tuli » Fri Oct 14, 2016 7:58 pm

Wow, I recognized a lot of what was described in that article. Particularly the part about being confused and second-guessing yourself. I've been groped several times on public transport and all those times I just internally went through this chain of "is this really happening, is it a mistake, what's going on here". In the end I didn't "make a scene" any of those times because it was either too crowded to know who it was or because I didn't feel sure enough.

Then a step up: I think I've told this story before but one time when I was a teen I was at a friend's house party and had a bit too much to drink so I went to sleep it off in her room. I woke up to a stranger in bed behind me, just feeling up my stomach while having a conversation with some other guys there. I just completely froze until my friend poked her head in the room to see how I was doing and I just jumped up and ran away. To this day I have no idea who this guy was or what he looked like. Another time a guy cornered me in the bathroom and took his dick out trying to get me to touch it. This time I just laughed in his face, got out and told my friends about it. Much fun was made at his expense and I think he left after that.

Then there's verbal harassment that can feel as violating as a physical groping. There's a client at work who likes to refer to himself as "uncle Jack" and ask crap like "have you been a good girl" and so on. Apparently he does it to all the female workers there. First time it happened to me I felt really shocked and disgusted but I didn't know how to react or what to say at all. Fortunately he doesn't come in on the hours I work now.

For the record, I've never been groped by a woman (I guess the anonymous public transport incidents could go either way but idk). And I think the article is the author talking about her own experiences with sexual assault, so maybe she similarly has never been groped by a woman?
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby DamianaRaven » Fri Oct 14, 2016 11:20 pm

Cordslash wrote:a lot of really manly stuff


You're the man, Corn Dip! Seriously, you're the yardstick by which I measure a lot of assholes. So many of them cum up way short.

Tesseracts wrote:This article rings hollow for me. I've never been groped,...


So you really have no idea what you're talking about.

Tesseracts wrote:Some people might be scared off by yelling but that's not always sufficient for self defense. If someone starts harassing you in any way (physical or verbal) you should react like you would to a wild bear. Be as loud and aggressive as possible until they leave, and if they don't leave I hope you have bear spray.


So, because it hasn't worked for you (despite the fact that you've never been unexpectedly assaulted) it's bad advice for any woman? I think you don't know as much as you like to think you do, Ms. Gravina.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby NathanLoiselle » Sat Oct 15, 2016 1:24 am

DamianaRaven wrote:
Tesseracts wrote:This article rings hollow for me. I've never been groped,...


So you really have no idea what you're talking about.

Tesseracts wrote:Some people might be scared off by yelling but that's not always sufficient for self defense. If someone starts harassing you in any way (physical or verbal) you should react like you would to a wild bear. Be as loud and aggressive as possible until they leave, and if they don't leave I hope you have bear spray.


So, because it hasn't worked for you (despite the fact that you've never been unexpectedly assaulted) it's bad advice for any woman? I think you don't know as much as you like to think you do, Ms. Gravina.


Oooooooooooooooo...
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby DamianaRaven » Sat Oct 15, 2016 1:47 am

NathanLoiselle wrote:Oooooooooooooooo...


Sit down, dear... it's not that interesting!
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Cobra-D » Sat Oct 15, 2016 1:55 am

Oh! I was groped once. It was at a caged the elephant concert kinda surreal really. Of course at the time i was more into the music and more worried about getting my wallet jacked so I was appreciated at the time. She was cute too so i'm not sure what my point is.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby BROWNRECLUSE » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:06 am

Cobra-D wrote:Oh! I was groped once. It was at a caged the elephant concert


They actually had more songs than just that one that was on the Borderlands soundtrack?
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Tesseracts wrote:In this age of falsehoods and lies, it's comforting to know some people are genuinely idiots.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby DamianaRaven » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:13 am

Cobra-D wrote:She was cute too so i'm not sure what my point is.


Did you like it? There's no shame in feeling confusedly flattered about something like that. There have been a few times that I've actually enjoyed behavior for which I should have showed my entire ass.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Cobra-D » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:16 am

BROWNRECLUSE wrote:
Cobra-D wrote:Oh! I was groped once. It was at a caged the elephant concert


They actually had more songs than just that one that was on the Borderlands soundtrack?


They're pretty big and have like three big albums with many great songs. Aint no rest for the wicked, in one ear, shake me down, come a litte closer, cigarette daydreams, trouble. Stop being old, it's weird.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby BROWNRECLUSE » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:23 am

Stop being old, it's weird.


No, you stop being young!
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Crimson847 » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:25 am

DamianaRaven wrote:
Tesseracts wrote:This article rings hollow for me. I've never been groped,...


So you really have no idea what you're talking about.

Tesseracts wrote:Some people might be scared off by yelling but that's not always sufficient for self defense. If someone starts harassing you in any way (physical or verbal) you should react like you would to a wild bear. Be as loud and aggressive as possible until they leave, and if they don't leave I hope you have bear spray.


So, because it hasn't worked for you (despite the fact that you've never been unexpectedly assaulted) it's bad advice for any woman? I think you don't know as much as you like to think you do, Ms. Gravina.


Whoa.

Image

I mean, I had some questions about that advice too, but now it seems like a bad time to raise them.
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"If it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them; but the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?"
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