Favorite Comments

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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Daggermeister » Tue Oct 20, 2015 10:28 pm

I would understand if his posts are unfunny and/or assholish, but as the green thumbs speak for themselves, most of us actually think he's a funny guy. I don't understand the hatedom, but as the saying goes, "haters gonna hate". Those are probably the same people who hate on John Cheese or Christina H.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby NathanLoiselle » Tue Oct 20, 2015 10:42 pm

I feed off of anti-multiple comment hatedoms! FEED OFF THEM!
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby thatindianguy » Tue Oct 20, 2015 10:46 pm

Marcuse wrote:
Daggermeister wrote:Did something happen to thatindianguyII? He always makes a few comments in every article, and I didn't see any today. It's kinda jarring when something you think of as routine just disappears.


He does have an account here as thatindianguy, so if you're looking to contact him you might drop him a PM. I don't know of anything, maybe he's just busy.



Actually it's the exact opposite, I was taking a nap.

Also a monkey chewed through our phone line. Which despite the impression I've given of my country is still a cause for some alarm.

I mean monkeys this far south? Something foul is afoot.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby DoglovingJim » Wed Oct 21, 2015 6:58 am

thatindianguy wrote:
Marcuse wrote:
Daggermeister wrote:Did something happen to thatindianguyII? He always makes a few comments in every article, and I didn't see any today. It's kinda jarring when something you think of as routine just disappears.


He does have an account here as thatindianguy, so if you're looking to contact him you might drop him a PM. I don't know of anything, maybe he's just busy.



Actually it's the exact opposite, I was taking a nap.

Also a monkey chewed through our phone line. Which despite the impression I've given of my country is still a cause for some alarm.

I mean monkeys this far south? Something foul is afoot.



Monkey chewed through your phone line? Hahaha. Man India sounds like it can be a strange place sometimes.

Wait... India... Thatguy... Monkeys... Stories...

*remembers*

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Spoiler: show
Thu Mar 12, 2015 6:16 am
thatindianguy wrote:writing stuff is like my one talent. Jokes, anecdotes ,made up stories about India I can't believe I suckered you into believing etc. And it really bums me out to think I might be losing my touch.



Sun Apr 19, 2015 1:13 am
DoglovingJim wrote:
thatindianguy wrote:made up stories about India I can't believe I suckered you into believing etc.


WHAT THE FUCK!!!

Image



You ruined it for me... YOU RUINED IT DAMMIT! I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO ENJOY THESE STORIES ANYMORE.



YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP! AH, DAMN YOU! GOD DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!
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Edgar Cabrera wrote:HOLY SHIT GUYS, IT'S DOGLOVINGJIM!!! HE'S HERE!!!

skoobadive wrote:It's the legendary DoglovingJim! Ohboy, this must be the greatest day of my life!

Cracked.com wrote:Initially, his interest in animals was "primarily a sexual attraction," but as he grew older, he also "developed the emotional attraction." We guess we could call what Jim does ... dog-lovin'
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Qinglong » Wed Oct 21, 2015 11:16 pm

Ahh, Oct 21, 2015. Among the many time-travel-related articles is/was/will be 5 Weird Side Effects You'd Experience As A Time Traveler. In the comments, hilarity ensued when RichardBurton stated:

RichardBurton wrote:Oh god I got hardly any time left!
I came back to warn you all: in 12 days, 3 hours and 24 minutes a giant sp
TheTurntables wrote:onge falls out of the sky and absorbs half the oceans.
8====D wrote:andex-wearing middle aged woman will try to feed you home-made pot roast. DO NOT EAT THE POT ROAST.
Field_ignored wrote:ace penis. That's it. There will be a gigantic, interstellar dong.
8====D wrote:I'm OK with that.
CorruptUser wrote:-eckled cucumber from Jebediah's farm patch wins "best in show" at the county fair, which bankrupts the Bundy's ranch.
Sentientmonkey wrote:oon will fall from the sky, awakening the cereal titan, who will wage war against a massive banana destroying the world as the prophecy foretold!
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Man created logic and because of that was superior to it. Logic He gave unto me, but no more. The tool does not describe the designer. More than this I do not choose to say. More than this you have no need to know.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Qinglong » Tue Nov 10, 2015 9:51 pm

Perhaps not surprisingly, The 5 Most Clever Ways People Made Hate Groups Look Stupid has many comments.

SpyKoopa wrote:Good lord. All target did where I live was remove the blue and pink backgrounds from the shelves. Oh noes! How will parents now know where to go get their girl's dolls if the aisles don't have pink backgrounds!??
ScorpionTube wrote:My local Target did that and I accidentally took my 4-year-old son down the dolls aisle. He turned gay instantaneously.

Target is just the worst.
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Man created logic and because of that was superior to it. Logic He gave unto me, but no more. The tool does not describe the designer. More than this I do not choose to say. More than this you have no need to know.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Knicholas » Fri Nov 20, 2015 6:39 pm

Today's article on "Scientifically Impossible Scenarios You're Worried About" came up with this from Weleasewodger

When the machine revolution comes and humanity is wiped out by Google's robot armies, the last terrified groups of humans will huddle together listening for the sound of the terminators announcing themselves with the cry I earnt $9500 a week working from home.


And I laughed, and laughed and laughed.

And cried a bit because I'm afraid it's true. . .
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Qinglong » Tue Dec 08, 2015 5:03 pm

You've just got to admire QueenoftheCats' comment in 5 Legendary Pop-Culture Works Created Only To Make A Point:
QueenoftheCats wrote:The sun did not shine,
It was too wet to play,
So I went on Cracked,
To kill hours in the day.

And while I was there,
I had a quick look,
At an article 'bout,
Dr Seuss and his book.

They said he was great,
With his 'Cat in the Hat!'
So I said we'll see,
Yes we'll see about that!

If using that style,
Gave Seuss his fame,
Then I'll write a comment,
Using the same.

If Seuss became famous,
For his cat in the hat,
Then I'll get all the thumbs,
For a comment like that!

And she is getting all the thumbs!
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Man created logic and because of that was superior to it. Logic He gave unto me, but no more. The tool does not describe the designer. More than this I do not choose to say. More than this you have no need to know.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby DoglovingJim » Tue Dec 08, 2015 5:20 pm

Qinglong wrote:You've just got to admire QueenoftheCats' comment in 5 Legendary Pop-Culture Works Created Only To Make A Point:
QueenoftheCats wrote:The sun did not shine,
It was too wet to play,
So I went on Cracked,
To kill hours in the day.

And while I was there,
I had a quick look,
At an article 'bout,
Dr Seuss and his book.

They said he was great,
With his 'Cat in the Hat!'
So I said we'll see,
Yes we'll see about that!

If using that style,
Gave Seuss his fame,
Then I'll write a comment,
Using the same.

If Seuss became famous,
For his cat in the hat,
Then I'll get all the thumbs,
For a comment like that!

And she is getting all the thumbs!


QueenoftheCats... Now where have I heard that name before?

arch enemy.png
arch enemy.png (18.64 KiB) Viewed 8740 times

Oh right, archnemesis.

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Edgar Cabrera wrote:HOLY SHIT GUYS, IT'S DOGLOVINGJIM!!! HE'S HERE!!!

skoobadive wrote:It's the legendary DoglovingJim! Ohboy, this must be the greatest day of my life!

Cracked.com wrote:Initially, his interest in animals was "primarily a sexual attraction," but as he grew older, he also "developed the emotional attraction." We guess we could call what Jim does ... dog-lovin'
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Qinglong » Tue Dec 08, 2015 6:03 pm

DoglovingJim wrote:Oh right, archnemesis.

This isn't going to involve you and her peeing on the floor, is it?
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Man created logic and because of that was superior to it. Logic He gave unto me, but no more. The tool does not describe the designer. More than this I do not choose to say. More than this you have no need to know.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Qinglong » Sat Dec 12, 2015 3:58 pm

As you might expect, any topic with a title containing "gun" is sure to get a lot of comments. Fortunately, the top comment (so far) of 5 Reasons Why Gun Ranges Help More Than You Think is classic:

TSuperbus wrote:To be fair guns and bras are similar. I was struggling with one once which caused my weapon to discharge in an unsafe manner. Ruined her cashmere sweater.
Thunderous wrote:And I'm willing to bet it took you a few minutes to reload as well, right?
TSuperbus wrote:@Thunderous,

Nah. Back then I was a teenager so I was packing a semiautomatic.

Now that I'm older it has changed into a medieval cannon. Lots of smoke, noise and blood and the team of highly trained professionals handling it still can't get it to aim correctly.
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Man created logic and because of that was superior to it. Logic He gave unto me, but no more. The tool does not describe the designer. More than this I do not choose to say. More than this you have no need to know.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Anglerphobe » Sat Dec 12, 2015 5:19 pm

We need to get TSuperbus on the Sex With Me thread.
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"Tusser, they tell me, when thou wert alive,
Thou, teaching thrift, thyselfe couldst never thrive.
So, like the whetstone, many men are wont
To sharpen others, when themselves are blunt."

Anyone who has any kind of opinion fucking disgusts me.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby DoglovingJim » Tue Dec 15, 2015 2:54 pm

Anglerphobe wrote:We need to get TSuperbus on the Sex With Me thread.


Sex With Me thread? Wait, we have one of those???

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Edgar Cabrera wrote:HOLY SHIT GUYS, IT'S DOGLOVINGJIM!!! HE'S HERE!!!

skoobadive wrote:It's the legendary DoglovingJim! Ohboy, this must be the greatest day of my life!

Cracked.com wrote:Initially, his interest in animals was "primarily a sexual attraction," but as he grew older, he also "developed the emotional attraction." We guess we could call what Jim does ... dog-lovin'
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Qinglong » Tue Dec 15, 2015 7:20 pm

The #1 item in 6 Popular 'Luxury' Products That Are Based On An Absurd Lie is "Beats Headphones And Monster Cables Are Only Heavy To Make Them Seem Valuable". King.Zog took exception to this.

King.Zog wrote:Monster Cables do indeed make a noticeable difference to volume and tone, and anyone who says otherwise is an idiot. To prove this point yourself, get a longish (3m?) Monster Cable, a 3m budget cable, and head over to the testing area of your local hi-fi store. Proceed to roundly flog the salesdrone trying to sell you pointless overpriced garbage, first with the lightweight flimsy "no-name" nonsense, and then with the much more substantial Monster Cable.

You will notice an immediate and profound difference, as the irritable "hey, what do you think you're doing" noises instantly change in pitch and desperation when you switch to the heavier Monster Cable - you really can hear every subtle note of anguish. The only downside is, I would say, duration; a snakeoil salesdrone brutalised with a Monster Cable will typically only retain consciousness for 10-15 minutes, whereas they can last much, much longer with cheaper brands.

tl;dr: Monster Cables are indeed much better, you merely have to find the correct application.
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Man created logic and because of that was superior to it. Logic He gave unto me, but no more. The tool does not describe the designer. More than this I do not choose to say. More than this you have no need to know.
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Re: Favorite Comments

Postby Qinglong » Sun Jan 24, 2016 9:00 pm

One of the best things about Cracked, Chris Bucholz, had another excellent article yesterday, 5 Reasons Most Lifehacks Are Actually Totally Useless. Seanzzxx posted this insightful anecdote:

Seanzzxx wrote:Comment from Brockway about Bucholz he did in an AMA, still relevant to this day I think:

"The fact of the matter is, nobody's ever asked me not to write [straight-up comedy]. They haven't even implied it. But I've seen the numbers decline drastically on fiction/straight comedy pieces. If anything, the higher ups want us to keep doing that kind of stuff just to keep experimenting and innovating, but as a writer it's damn depressing to bust your ass on a piece and watch it wallow.

So almost all of us just kind of silently agreed to stop writing that kind of stuff, since the audience was no longer there for it.

Well, all except Bucholz. Bucholz don't give a s**t. The site could go under today, and ten years later you could check our mailbox and find a decade's worth of Bucholz articles about whatever the f**k he felt like. He'd just keep doing them. He's a machine. A terrifying one. We've tried to stop him, but you've seen that documentary, The Terminator? Didn't go great."
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Man created logic and because of that was superior to it. Logic He gave unto me, but no more. The tool does not describe the designer. More than this I do not choose to say. More than this you have no need to know.
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