Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby DamianaRaven » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:30 am

Crimson847 wrote:I mean, I had some questions about that advice too, but now it seems like a bad time to raise them.


I love questions! Right or wrong, I'm sure I have an answer! I happen to possess a reasonably desirable body that I've swung a few times around a brass pole, so I might even know a thing or two on the subject of being groped.

Cordslash wrote:And I'm not hot in anyone's books.


*quietly opens a certain ledger, turns it around, and slides it across the table with one finger*
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Tesseracts » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:37 am

Tuli wrote:For the record, I've never been groped by a woman (I guess the anonymous public transport incidents could go either way but idk). And I think the article is the author talking about her own experiences with sexual assault, so maybe she similarly has never been groped by a woman?

It is primarily about her experience, but she also makes generalizations about the male and female experience. She strongly implies all women will inevitably be groped some time in their life. She advises men on what they can do to stop groping, which makes it sound like women are never at fault, because the responsibility is (solely?) on men to fix this. There isn't even a one sentence acknowledgement that these roles may be reversed. I think her account of her own experiences is interesting, and it's really chilling how she describes the men being sophisticated enough to put on a facade of normalcy during the attack. It's completely contrary to the stereotypical interaction you see on TV. However since she also wrote about the issue in general it would be nice if she (or the Cracked editors) were a bit more inclusive. In my own life for example I seem to be a magnet for predatory women. I don't know why that's an issue for me but I kind of wish people would mention it more often.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby DamianaRaven » Sat Oct 15, 2016 2:46 am

Tesseracts wrote:In my own life for example I seem to be a magnet for predatory women.


What do they do to you, these predatory women?
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Crimson847 » Sat Oct 15, 2016 4:42 am

DamianaRaven wrote:
Crimson847 wrote:I mean, I had some questions about that advice too, but now it seems like a bad time to raise them.


I love questions! Right or wrong, I'm sure I have an answer! I happen to possess a reasonably desirable body that I've swung a few times around a brass pole, so I might even know a thing or two on the subject of being groped.


I actually meant questions for Tess.

I do have a question for you, though: why are you doing this?

DamianaRaven wrote:
Tesseracts wrote:In my own life for example I seem to be a magnet for predatory women.


What do they do to you, these predatory women?


I presume they would attack her intelligence or appearance or something.

Hypothetically.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Keato1 » Sat Oct 15, 2016 5:12 am

I may be wrong, but wasn't there a Cracked article a long time ago about a male stripper who talked about how grabby women get? Not that it is directly relevant...
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby AboveGL » Sat Oct 15, 2016 8:15 am

I agree with Cordslash 100%.

The article and comments are incredibly harrowing. This makes me want to go all Batman on guys that do this shit.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Kivutar » Sat Oct 15, 2016 7:30 pm

It's weird that y'all are arguing about this, since everybody involved is a reasonable person.

Groping is wrong, whoever does it. That article was about a woman who was groped by men.

Women shouldn't grope either. If you're a dude or a gal who was groped by women, they're just as big assholes as men who grope women. This article didn't happen to be about that, because a) it was about the author's personal experience, and b) statistics suggest most gropings are men groping women. Other experiences are also valid, and many of the same points apply.

For what it's worth, I've never been groped, either by a man or a woman. (*High fives Tess*) Again, doesn't contradict statistics.

Other kinds of dickery are other kinds of dickery too. Stop being dicks, humans.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Tesseracts » Sat Oct 15, 2016 8:25 pm

Kivutar wrote:It's weird that y'all are arguing about this, since everybody involved is a reasonable person.

YOU DON'T KNOW ME! I CAN BE JUST AS UNREASONABLE AS ANYONE ELSE! I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I CAN HOLD UP TO 52 PAIRS OF OPINIONS WHICH CONTRADICT EACH OTHER IN MY BRAIN AT ONCE.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby JamishT » Sat Oct 15, 2016 8:27 pm

Kivutar wrote:Other kinds of dickery are other kinds of dickery too. Stop being dicks, humans.


My favorite variety of dickery is hickory. It even has its own dock!
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Crimson847 » Sat Oct 15, 2016 9:05 pm

Tesseracts wrote:
Kivutar wrote:It's weird that y'all are arguing about this, since everybody involved is a reasonable person.

YOU DON'T KNOW ME! I CAN BE JUST AS UNREASONABLE AS ANYONE ELSE! I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I CAN HOLD UP TO 52 PAIRS OF OPINIONS WHICH CONTRADICT EACH OTHER IN MY BRAIN AT ONCE.


...So they're like chromosomes? They're...opinosomes?
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby ghijkmnop » Sat Oct 15, 2016 9:38 pm

Redacted
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Matthew Notch » Sat Oct 15, 2016 10:02 pm

I assume the same things that cause men to grope women are also what cause women to grope men. 15% horniness, 75% asserting dominance over another human, 10% boredom and/or bipolar compulsion. So the same lesson in any event, then?
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby Tesseracts » Sun Oct 16, 2016 3:14 am

It's not really the same lesson. The lesson of this article is if you're a woman, you will inevitably get groped and there is nothing you can do to stop it. Seriously, she says that. The lesson is also if you're a man you probably have friends like Donald Trump and you need to tell them to shut up. So it's a lesson based on stereotypes, fear mongering and falsehoods, tired loosely to a current political event. Standard Cracked content I suppose. You could say the behavior is about dominance, but the article says nothing like that, and doesn't actually talk about the motives of assaulters at all.

Every time violence against women comes up in the mainstream media, we have to re learn the lesson that this is a common and really serious problem. That's cool and all, but our clickbait based economy warps this into "ALL WOMEN ARE RAPED ALL THE TIME WITHOUT EXCEPTION. PREPARE TO DIE AT ANY MOMENT BUT ONLY IF YOU HAVE A VAGINA." I'm tired of it.
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby FaceTheCitizen » Sun Oct 16, 2016 3:18 am

...
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Re: Everything A Woman Should Know (Before She's Groped)

Postby reallifegirl » Sun Oct 16, 2016 3:01 pm

Eh, I don't know if it's fear-mongering if it really is common. I'm not saying there aren't exceptions, but I know I've been groped, a lot of my close female friends have been, and even ones who weren't necessarily touched physically still dealt with harassment of some variety. I don't think it's inappropriate to talk to people about how to deal with these situations when they come up -- not everybody's gonna be in a building on fire, but we still teach people their fire exits.

Can it go overboard? Maybe. But is it rooted in a real problem that does frighten people? Yeah. And I do think, to some extent, the hype over it now is based around the idea that people would downplay this sort of thing in the past.

I've had dudes on the subway feel up my ass or squeeze my knee/leg. An old coworker, back in my door-to-door salesman days, used to run his hands over my back while we were in the company van. The incident that freaked me out the worst was when I was in Seattle and my gay male friend wanted to hit up Capitol Hill, the gay nightlife area. The night ended with us very drunk at a very popular gay club, where I blacked out. I woke up to a dude making out with my neck and his hand up my shirt. I made some sort of 'excuse me' gesture and bolted to find my friend, who didn't realize there was a problem. When we wandered back on to the dance floor later, this guy grabbed my arm and yanked me back and went right back to shoving his hands up my shirt and making out with my face. I think what saved me from dealing with him too long is that the club closed for the night not long afterward. My friend explained later that that's an ongoing problem at some clubs, that some non-gay dudes will prey on women at gay clubs because they'll let their guard down.

Had a couple instances of woman-on-woman groping though I think those were sort of...drunken not-realizing they'd overstepped a boundary? One of my oldest friends once, to quote a Republican presidential nominee, grabbed me by the pussy as a joke. I wasn't offended, mostly just uncomfortable, and if it had been a pattern I'd have said something.
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