5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On TV

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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby Kate » Mon Jan 15, 2018 7:10 am

Deathclaw_Puncher wrote:Still, it's an odd thing to fret about. Again, not your concern.


What exactly is not my concern? And why is it not my concern?

It kind of is my concern when legitimate concerns are conflated with trolling and bigotry. Even if a concern is misplaced, equating it to trolling is problematic because people stop taking advocates seriously. If everything is met anger and accusations of transphobia, people who are otherwise inclined to listen will stop because no intellectual inquiry will be allowed and no concerns will be addressed and no fears will be assuaged, they'll just be shouted at.


I'm not saying you're blocking anybody from anything, I'm just saying it's an odd thing to fret about. People just seem to get so worked up about it, as if someone not wanting kids, or not being able to have kids strikes a nerve with them.

It might seem odd to you, but regret about reproduction is something a lot of people can relate to; people who are happy they have kids get concerned about people who don't get to, and people who regret not having kids are especially concerned that others will have to deal with it, and people who are happy not to have had kids don't often get a lot of attention. Reproduction is a pretty big deal in our society and reproduction regret (both ways) is painful.

The opposition to sterilization is also not unique to the trans community. Women are often not allowed to have procedures to be sterilized unless they are either a certain age or have had a certain number of children already, and it's because doctors are afraid of being sued when women regret the decision later because...well, it happens.

Reproduction is such a common human thing that everyone's thought about it. We've all made choices about whether we want to or not. It really does strike a nerve with people, for better or worse. Frankly, I feel that if someone was not informed that transitioning sterilizes you and given the option to store sperm or eggs for later, that would not be fully-informed consent. And that strikes a nerve with me.
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby Ladki96 » Mon Jan 15, 2018 7:29 am

I don't think anything Kate said warrants this somewhat rude (in my opinion) response. From what I understood, all Kate said was that there are people who honestly offer reasonable points on sterilization fears. She gave an example of an actual trans person who has talked about it. I found a recent video of the woman on transition doubts, and apart from the clickbaity title/picture (she doesn't regret it, she just talks about people that do) I don't think much of what she said was off the mark.



Why shouldn't one be concerned some trans people might potentially be miserable later on? Shouldn't one look out for another in a society? I don't see what's wrong with just making people who wish to take the step aware of what exactly it entails. If it came from other trans people perhaps that would be more acceptable? ^^
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby gisambards » Mon Jan 15, 2018 9:16 am

If I decided to medically transition, I would definitely save some sperm. It's common for someone to decide they don't want kids in your early 20s (as of right now, I really don't want kids), but I think a lot of people would find themselves regretting actively stopping themselves from having kids by the time they were older.

And dismissing Blair White's opinion on this is completely unnecessary. I disagree with a lot of what she says, but here she's talking about a drawback to something she does actually believe in and has personally experienced - medical transitioning - and so that should definitely be taken into account regardless of what they think of other elements of transgenderism.
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Mon Jan 15, 2018 9:56 am

gisambards wrote:And dismissing Blair White's opinion on this is completely unnecessary. I disagree with a lot of what she says, but here she's talking about a drawback to something she does actually believe in and has personally experienced - medical transitioning - and so that should definitely be taken into account regardless of what they think of other elements of transgenderism.

But those opinions of said elements are....... kind of odd.
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby DamianaRaven » Mon Jan 15, 2018 2:22 pm

Deathclaw_Puncher wrote:People just seem to get so worked up about it, as if someone not wanting kids, or not being able to have kids strikes a nerve with them.


Well, Kate is not one of those people and now (I think) you owe her an apology. You were rude, dismissive, and condescending and I'm not the only one who saw it that way.
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby Tesseracts » Mon Jan 15, 2018 2:51 pm

Deathclaw_Puncher wrote:I'm not saying you're blocking anybody from anything, I'm just saying it's an odd thing to fret about. People just seem to get so worked up about it, as if someone not wanting kids, or not being able to have kids strikes a nerve with them.

What exactly is the difference between "concern" and "concern trolling?" Am I not allowed to be concerned about other people? I believe we all have a right to do what we want with our body, but some people do have regrets about transitioning and that is concerning.
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby DamianaRaven » Mon Jan 15, 2018 3:18 pm

I would say the difference is sincerity. Concern trolls aren't actually concerned about the issue they're arguing, they're just using points of concern to naysay without looking like a complete "because that's how I want it to be" asswipe. People like to believe that their bigotries are grounded in logic and benevolence rather than the ignorance and cruelty of which they're usually borne. Has anyone here EVER met a person who freely admits to being an authoritarian bigot? No, they always have a list of reasons, many of which are contrived to sound reasonable or even noble.

An example of concern trolling would be the person who argues that abortion should be illegal because of the many (and mostly fictional) health risks involved: breast cancer, depression, sterility, and so forth. Then, half a dozen posts down the thread, you'll see them sneering that women who get abortions totally deserve to die writhing in a pool of blood, because they're murderous sin whores... or whatever. Another example is the person who uses "obesity is unhealthy" to promote their notion that all fat people should be chased with whips until they look hot in a bathing suit. That way, they can tell themselves they're not really being sadistic sociopaths because they're just "concerned about everybody's health."

There probably ARE a lot of concern trolls arguing about transgender people. The way to tell them from those genuinely concerned is to look at their end game. Concern trolls will use all their "fertility" and "mental health" points as reasons that we should totally REJECT and thwart and even oppress transgender people. Someone who really cares is bringing up the same points in search of ways to HELP transgender people receive better medical care. It can sometimes take a little patience, but if you're willing to wait and watch, it rarely takes a concern troll long to show their true colors.
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby SandTea » Mon Jan 15, 2018 9:33 pm

Fellas, ladies, I don't think that was Deathclaws point. I thought it was referring to the folk who think reproduction the only reason we humans should exist. Like those preacher guys who say "gays serve no purpose" because they can't make babies without help.

Deathclaw_Puncher wrote:The weirdest sort of transphobic rhetoric I've come across is concern trolls worried about sterilization and breeding, as if the human race will go extinct if just one more person gets orchi or SRS, and they are forever the vanguard against such treachery.


I don't think that was in any way about the ability (or regret of not having that ability) to have kids. In fact, I see it as agreeing with y'all. Just that there is a common enough sentiment that claims kid having viability as a counter point to acceptance of LGBT to warrant a rebuff. Or at least a comment of confusion about their motives. Humans are not going to go extinct because of butt stuff. BUT (heh) I have heard that from people who, I assume, are just against butt stuff.
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Last edited by SandTea on Mon Jan 15, 2018 10:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Mon Jan 15, 2018 9:55 pm

Also, at least on the surface, that particular talking point may be interpreted as a sure bet, especially through the social barrier that is the internet.
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Re: 5 Bizarre Realities Of My 'Sex Change' You Don't See On

Postby D-LOGAN » Sat Jan 20, 2018 2:31 am

Deathclaw_Puncher wrote:I'm not saying you're blocking anybody from anything, I'm just saying it's an odd thing to fret about. People just seem to get so worked up about it, as if someone not wanting kids, or not being able to have kids strikes a nerve with them.


Maybe the reason people bring it up is not because as you interpret it- i.e. as them getting their nerves struck by other humans not procreating, but rather a form of empathy in the form of being concerned for others of their species, given they may feel certain people will end up in a situation they regret with permenant consequences (infertility) and they don't want that for them. As for many people not being able to have children will be something they won't be happy with.

And maybe because you can't comprehend that form of empathy, it's an odd concept to you or whatnot, you can only put it down to them having malicious motives i.e. some kind of militant 'ALL MUST HAVE CHILDREN OR I SHALL BE OFFENDED' mindset.

Basically what I'm saying is just because something appears odd to you doesn't mean it will to others. And when it comes to wanting to have children, I imagine the vast majority of the human race would fall into the catagory of that. Not all of course, not by a long shot. But given how many people fall into that group, as well as people who at one point don't want to but will go on to have a change of heart, I personally don't consider being concerned for others that it may be something they regret as being odd at all. I think it's a very understandable one.

And as for the whole genuinely concerned people vs concern trolls, well I imagine there are of course people who feign concern to mask bigotted intent. But then again there also people who write off all opposing opinion and argument as being disingenuous and coming from a place of malice. That way you always win the argument and always have the moral high ground, because anyone who claims to disagree with you doesn't actually have an actual opposing view or their own honest perspective, they're just trolling and can be dismissed without considering their points.

That's just my take.

Also, Blaire White rocks!

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