Sad Central

Polls everywhere, but not a single dancer. Intelligence optional.

Re: Sad Central

Postby CarrieVS » Fri Apr 22, 2016 12:01 am

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A Combustible Lemon wrote:Death is an archaic concept for simpleminded commonfolk, not Victorian scientist whales.
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Re: Sad Central

Postby Matthew Notch » Mon Apr 25, 2016 2:43 am

Copy pasta from Reddit. It was a writing prompt: "An elderly couple goes into petty crime to see their superhero kids, who never visit anymore."

Spoiler: show
James was the average man of his age; he grew up in a poor family with five siblings, got conscripted into Vietnam where he made friends and lost some too, then came home to a family of his own. Unlike his parents, though, he decided to have just one child- he saw both how much his parents struggled and how little affection they showed with such massive time constraints. Supporting that many children is no simple task, and comes with sacrifice. The six of them returned the favor later in life, visiting and helping take care of their parents until old age took them from this world.
Now, James is seventy-two; wisps of grey hairs poke out of his head like fading memories. His life is dull, his back and hips are worn out to the point he can't garden for long or fire a rifle properly anymore. Old age takes a lot of what you once loved from you, including the people around you. Three siblings lost, and a wife that passed too soon...
But his son is enough to make it all worth it. The light of his life; the sum of his existence. The culmination of years spent nurting, like a sapling sprouting into a thick, strong Oak tree.

James lazily flipped through channels on the TV, earning grumpy shouts of refute from the other elderly people sitting in the rec room with him.
"Keep the damn channel still, you're going to give me vertigo."
He shushed her. "Quiet, Doris. My son might be on TV again and I need to find him."
Channel 5 was the jackpot.
"Breaking news, brought to you live: during an armed heist of the local Bank of America, one man took down five burglars single-handed. It's unlike anything we've ever seen before- no hostages were harmed, and the money has been returned safely. We'll keep you updated as time goes by."
The helicopter camera panned out over a crowd of bystanders cheering and police taking the robbers into custody. Just barely, as James scooted forward and squinted, he could see his son waving to the crowd.
"See, Doris! That's my Kevin! I told you he'd be on TV again!" The old man lit up like a Christmas tree on a dark, December night.
"That's not even impressive. Frank, I want to watch the cooking shows. Change it back already."
His smile faded and his mouth twisted. "What the fuck am I doing in this place? I'm not Frank. Here, Doris, watch your cooking shows."
He changed the channel, went back to his room and put proper clothes on. How long has it been? A year, maybe more? Two years? I can't wait any longer. I need to see my baby boy again.
Rifling through his closet, there was a carton of old love letters from his late wife. He looked at them and smiled, but underneath them was a .22 pistol that no one had caught during his entry inspection. He slipped it under his belt and walked up to the front desk. "Melissa, I'm gonna go for a walk today."
She smiled and waved her hand, buzzing the door open. He pretended to follow his usual path, hobbling on his cane, then deviated and slipped through an opening in the brush out back. He made his way to a gas station.
"Give me your money. Just a few dollars is fine," James shouted weakly, gun trembling in the air.
The cashier was calm for the situation. "Sir, put the gun down. Let me help you, okay? What do you need?"
James' voice began to crack. "Please, give me some money and call the police."
"Sir, j-"
"DO IT," he screamed, firing a shot to the right of him. Glass rained down with bits of cardboard and broken cigarettes. The man lifted his arms up and obliged, then handed him a hundred dollar bill.
James sat down outside the building and waited for about five minutes, staring at the clouds go by. Soon enough, his son arrived, like he always did.
"My son! I knew the city's superhero would make it here to save the day."
Kevin groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Dad, I'm not a superhero. I always tell you, I'm just a cop who does his job well. Come on, why'd you go and do something this drastic? Where'd you get the gun? Someone could've really been hurt, Dad."
James looked down, answering meekly. "I wanted to see you again. It's been several years now, you're always so busy."
Kevin took a deep breath as his father began to cry. "Come on, let's take you back to Glowing Meadows."
James lit up again, the hope of a younger man glinting in his eyes. "Can we play checkers?"
Kevin put an arm around his father, helping him into the car. "Yeah, we can play checkers. Just get in the car while I explain this to my supervisor, okay?"
"Sure thing, Kev, my man. I can't wait for you to tell me all about your job, and your love life. You need to get married and give me grandchildren!"
"Yeah, Dad. We'll talk all about it when we get back."
He shut the cruiser door and walked up to his superior officer. "Sorry, chief. My-"
"I heard the whole thing, son. You don't visit your father? I oughtta put you in jail. Respect is something the elderly earn."
Kevin' gaze shifted to the dirt, and he began to tremble a little. His voice was low and weak, barely audible.
"I just visited him three days ago, sir."
  • 15

It's Dangerous to Go Alone


"I desperately want Jiggery Pokery now."-- Pikajew

"I do feel that if she happens to favour attractive, successful, intelligent men I will be at a disadvantage."--Anglerphobe

"I have a beautiful sphincter and Mexico is gonna pay for it."--Kate
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Re: Sad Central

Postby Tuli » Wed Apr 27, 2016 1:38 pm

I'm not gonna copy it here because it is looong but totally worth a read. Sad and beautiful (and based on an Isaac Asimov story):

http://imgur.com/gallery/ApzEV
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Re: Sad Central

Postby Tesseracts » Thu May 05, 2016 2:30 am

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Re: Sad Central

Postby Tesseracts » Mon May 09, 2016 4:17 am

13164226_715149581921188_6124398685091097652_n.jpg
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Re: Sad Central

Postby Windy » Mon May 09, 2016 4:26 am

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Re: Sad Central

Postby Grimstone » Mon May 09, 2016 5:28 am

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"The struggle itself towards the heights is enough to fill a man's heart."
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Re: Sad Central

Postby NotCIAAgent » Tue May 10, 2016 5:07 am

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Where is the Rage Central? Even if fake, that made me quite grumpy, my frienderoos. : ^)
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Re: Sad Central

Postby Tesseracts » Tue May 10, 2016 6:01 am

I think I know who wrote that last one.

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Re: Sad Central

Postby Tesseracts » Tue May 10, 2016 5:35 pm

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Re: Sad Central

Postby Windy » Tue May 10, 2016 6:03 pm

Does cancer cause one of your eyes to become half-shut or something?
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Re: Sad Central

Postby Matthew Notch » Wed May 11, 2016 1:24 am



In this video:

Thom Yorke is old
Thom Yorke is homeless
Thom Yorke isn't really homeless, but recently divorced
Thom Yorke releases an entire goddamn album of this
Last song is a slow, pensive version of an old love song of theirs from the 90's
My feels are still smarting

Dick move, Radiohead.

EDIT:
Windy wrote:Does cancer cause one of your eyes to become half-shut or something?


It actually does. In fact, in this poor kid's case, that's how they discovered he had it in the first place. I didn't read as much of the post as I would have liked before I got a long phone call that pulled me away from it, but it wouldn't surprise me if he had the same cancer as my uncle Nathan, who literally had a bulge in his face by his eye because of it.
  • 6

It's Dangerous to Go Alone


"I desperately want Jiggery Pokery now."-- Pikajew

"I do feel that if she happens to favour attractive, successful, intelligent men I will be at a disadvantage."--Anglerphobe

"I have a beautiful sphincter and Mexico is gonna pay for it."--Kate
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Re: Sad Central

Postby Grimstone » Wed May 11, 2016 8:30 pm

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"The struggle itself towards the heights is enough to fill a man's heart."
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Re: Sad Central

Postby NotCIAAgent » Wed May 11, 2016 10:07 pm

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Re: Sad Central

Postby Matthew Notch » Fri May 13, 2016 2:18 am

Man, the bass work in this nihilist song is funky.

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It's Dangerous to Go Alone


"I desperately want Jiggery Pokery now."-- Pikajew

"I do feel that if she happens to favour attractive, successful, intelligent men I will be at a disadvantage."--Anglerphobe

"I have a beautiful sphincter and Mexico is gonna pay for it."--Kate
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