Well that escalated quickly

Polls everywhere, but not a single dancer. Intelligence optional.

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby SilverMaple » Sun Aug 30, 2015 7:33 pm

Why is that shopping cart full of Vaseline and cucumbers? I guess Pastor Johnson's eczema is acting up again. It's funny how that always happens around the same time he decides to make pickles.

I love going to Ikea
  • 9

Bert wrote:The best part of my job is fistfighting an 8 year old every day.


//Friend come and go, like the wave in the ocean, but true ones stay like an octopus on our face.\\
User avatar
SilverMaple
Champion
Champion
 
Posts: 1491
Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2015 6:34 pm
Location: In da Lab
Show rep
Title: Nerd of a Feather

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby Matthew Notch » Mon Aug 31, 2015 4:26 am

I love going to Ikea because their fine products give me valuable construction experience, useful for when I get around to finishing my Jew Torture Gauntlet.

This one here is for children
  • 6

It's Dangerous to Go Alone


"I desperately want Jiggery Pokery now."-- Pikajew

"I do feel that if she happens to favour attractive, successful, intelligent men I will be at a disadvantage."--Anglerphobe

"I have a beautiful sphincter and Mexico is gonna pay for it."--Kate
User avatar
Matthew Notch
TCS Junkie
TCS Junkie
 
Posts: 4950
Joined: Mon Apr 15, 2013 11:48 am
Location: The ICT
Show rep
Title: The Last Finisher

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby BROWNRECLUSE » Mon Aug 31, 2015 10:49 pm

Gather 'round! This one here is for the children!

(Unzips pants, drops underwear)



Can you believe the price of milk these days?
  • 6

Tesseracts wrote:In this age of falsehoods and lies, it's comforting to know some people are genuinely idiots.
User avatar
BROWNRECLUSE
Jedi Knight
Jedi Knight
 
Posts: 4142
Joined: Sat Mar 07, 2015 8:55 pm
Location: Inside your ear canal
Show rep

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby Matthew Notch » Tue Sep 01, 2015 4:05 am

Can you believe the price of milk these days? Anyway this will all be over as soon as you empty out the cash register into this bag. Try not to make a scene; we already killed the security guard, and I'll have no trouble killing you if you make a scene.

No pressure or anything
  • 6

It's Dangerous to Go Alone


"I desperately want Jiggery Pokery now."-- Pikajew

"I do feel that if she happens to favour attractive, successful, intelligent men I will be at a disadvantage."--Anglerphobe

"I have a beautiful sphincter and Mexico is gonna pay for it."--Kate
User avatar
Matthew Notch
TCS Junkie
TCS Junkie
 
Posts: 4950
Joined: Mon Apr 15, 2013 11:48 am
Location: The ICT
Show rep
Title: The Last Finisher

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby mancityfooty » Wed Sep 02, 2015 1:56 pm

"No pressure or anything..."

Image

"...but if you don't cut the right wire, we are f*cked."
"Cut the white wire? Ok."
"No! I didn't say 'white', I said..."

Image


I'll be right back. I just need to
  • 8

72% Vanilla
User avatar
mancityfooty
Time Waster
Time Waster
 
Posts: 1481
Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2015 10:16 pm
Location: Olathe, KS
Show rep
Title: Duke Mix a Lot

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby BROWNRECLUSE » Wed Sep 02, 2015 10:04 pm

I'll be right back. I just need to toss these bodies in the walk-in freezer. Can't have them stinkin' up the place.

Do you know how to
  • 7

Tesseracts wrote:In this age of falsehoods and lies, it's comforting to know some people are genuinely idiots.
User avatar
BROWNRECLUSE
Jedi Knight
Jedi Knight
 
Posts: 4142
Joined: Sat Mar 07, 2015 8:55 pm
Location: Inside your ear canal
Show rep

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby sunglasses » Wed Sep 02, 2015 10:42 pm

Do you know how to dispose of old dynamite without causing it to explode? Asking for a friend. Oh what's that? Don't store it near the furnace? Oh fu-BOOM!




Excuse me-do you have any
  • 7

TCS Etiquette Guide

Rules and FAQs

Zevran wrote:Magic can kill. Knives can kill. Even small children launched at great speeds can kill.
User avatar
sunglasses
TCS Moderator
TCS Moderator
 
Posts: 11541
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:52 pm
Show rep
Title: The Speaker of Horrors.

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby mancityfooty » Wed Sep 02, 2015 11:49 pm

Excuse me-do you have any grey poop on?
Oh? Just me then.
Would you like to have some of mine?


I can't wait to
  • 7

72% Vanilla
User avatar
mancityfooty
Time Waster
Time Waster
 
Posts: 1481
Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2015 10:16 pm
Location: Olathe, KS
Show rep
Title: Duke Mix a Lot

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby Matthew Notch » Thu Sep 03, 2015 3:56 am

I can't wait to die, because seriously this is the worst movie I've ever seen.

Do you like Sonic the Hedgehog?
  • 8

It's Dangerous to Go Alone


"I desperately want Jiggery Pokery now."-- Pikajew

"I do feel that if she happens to favour attractive, successful, intelligent men I will be at a disadvantage."--Anglerphobe

"I have a beautiful sphincter and Mexico is gonna pay for it."--Kate
User avatar
Matthew Notch
TCS Junkie
TCS Junkie
 
Posts: 4950
Joined: Mon Apr 15, 2013 11:48 am
Location: The ICT
Show rep
Title: The Last Finisher

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby DanteHoratio » Fri Sep 04, 2015 3:19 pm

Do you like Sonic the Hedgehog? Well, Sonic does not like you.

I went out to the forest to explore.
  • 6

"Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself." -Mark Twain

"I couldn't live a week without a private library - indeed, I'd part with all my furniture and squat and sleep on the floor before I'd let go of the 1500 or so books I possess." -HP Lovecraft
User avatar
DanteHoratio
TCS Sithlord
TCS Sithlord
 
Posts: 547
Joined: Thu May 28, 2015 9:17 pm
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
Show rep
Title: Let's get dangerous

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby JamishT » Fri Sep 04, 2015 9:41 pm

I went out to the forest to explore my cousin's sexuality.



I guess it's time for a haircut,
  • 8

JamishT was a heck of a guy,
With a devilish twinkle in his eye.
With his hand-picked flowers,
And his feel-good powers,
He made all the girls blush and sigh.
User avatar
JamishT
TCS ModerBlobber
TCS ModerBlobber
 
Posts: 5474
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 4:31 pm
Location: KC, MO, AMERICA
Show rep
Title: The Wannabe Adult

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby BROWNRECLUSE » Fri Sep 04, 2015 11:18 pm

I guess it's time for a haircut.

(Grabs clippers) Please hike up that skirt and stay still for a minute, my dear.


The toilet is overflowing again.
  • 7

Tesseracts wrote:In this age of falsehoods and lies, it's comforting to know some people are genuinely idiots.
User avatar
BROWNRECLUSE
Jedi Knight
Jedi Knight
 
Posts: 4142
Joined: Sat Mar 07, 2015 8:55 pm
Location: Inside your ear canal
Show rep

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby mancityfooty » Sat Sep 05, 2015 2:19 am

The toilet is overflowing again.
How many times do I have to tell you?
You disposing your "guests" in the toilet is not good for the plumbing.
This is exactly why we got that chipper/shredder.
Now use it!


I can't believe I
  • 7

72% Vanilla
User avatar
mancityfooty
Time Waster
Time Waster
 
Posts: 1481
Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2015 10:16 pm
Location: Olathe, KS
Show rep
Title: Duke Mix a Lot

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby skooma » Sat Sep 05, 2015 2:27 am

Must be faster...
Spoiler: show
The toilet is overflowing again. This time it's blood and puss, and it keeps yelling about being tired of our relatives, so who should we sacrifice?


I can't believe I didn't assrape your husband at that barbecue, I just forgot, don't worry I'll get to it before he can undercook again.

I can't wait to tear your clothes off and throw you in all that blood we stole, this will be great - do a scared face.

Is it me, or was this changed from I can't wait - probably me.

I forgot my keys
  • 4

Skooma seems the type of person to chase me down and force me at gun point to receive their encomium with good graces. ~Jack Road

* I got caught in the crossfire of one of skooma's fucking frisbees ~Sister Morphine
User avatar
skooma
TCS Necromancer
TCS Necromancer
 
Posts: 669
Joined: Fri Nov 21, 2014 10:21 pm
Location: Stuck in your door
Show rep
Title: The Lightning

Re: Well that escalated quickly

Postby CarrieVS » Sat Sep 05, 2015 2:33 pm

I forgot my keys, so I couldn't get into my bedridden grandmother's house to make her breakfast and change her oxygen cylinder. I'm sure she'll be ok until tomorrow.


Thank goodness it's the weekend...
  • 6

The Dungeon Master wrote:Those who don't want to be baptised, make a dexterity saving throw.
User avatar
CarrieVS
TCS Redshirt
TCS Redshirt
 
Posts: 7037
Joined: Sat Apr 20, 2013 7:43 pm
Location: By my wild self in the wet wild woods waving my wild tail
Show rep
Title: Swamp Thing

PreviousNext

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests