Politicians say the darndest things

Polls everywhere, but not a single dancer. Intelligence optional.

Politicians say the darndest things

Postby Tesseracts » Thu Oct 23, 2014 5:29 pm

Post your favorite bad quotes from politicians or about politics or tangentially related to politics here.

“As the hobbits are going up Mount Doom, the Eye of Mordor is being drawn somewhere else. It’s being drawn to Iraq and it’s not being drawn to the U.S. You know what? I want to keep it on Iraq. I don’t want the Eye to come back here to the United States.” -- Rick Santorum

"And the Tea Party Hobbits can return to Middle Earth having defeated Mordor." -- John McCain

Feel free to post non-hobbit related quotes, despite their inexplicable popularity among some Republicans.
  • 12

User avatar
Tesseracts
Big Brother
Big Brother
 
Posts: 9600
Joined: Sat Apr 13, 2013 5:31 am
Show rep
Title: Social Media Expert

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby NotCIAAgent » Thu Oct 23, 2014 5:35 pm

Image

Can't tell if the aneurysm I am having right now is due to piss poor Tolkien mythology knowledge or just political ignorance.


*liking the blood*


Piss poor Tolkien mythology knowledge.
  • 11

Image
User avatar
NotCIAAgent
Knight Writer
Knight Writer
 
Posts: 2914
Joined: Wed Oct 02, 2013 3:33 am
Location: 90's, Canada Wilderness
Show rep
Title: Shitposter Extraordinaire

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby sunglasses » Thu Oct 23, 2014 5:51 pm

Yes, many of my quotes are from Republicans but there's a binder full of democrats towards the bottom:


"Literally, if we took away the minimum wage – if conceivably it was gone – we could potentially, virtually wipe out unemployment completely because we would be able to offer jobs at whatever level."~Michelle Bauchman

" We have every mixture you can have. I have a black, a woman, two Jews and a cripple. And we have talent."~James Watt



"So if we decrease the use of carbon dioxide, are we not taking away plant food from the atmosphere?"~John Shimkus


"Wind is God’s way of balancing heat. Wind is the way you shift heat from areas where it’s hotter to areas where it’s cooler. That’s what wind is. Wouldn’t it be ironic if in the interest of global warming we mandated massive switches to energy, which is a finite resource, which slows the winds down, which causes the temperature to go up? […] I mean, it does make some sense. You stop something, you can’t transfer that heat, and the heat goes up. It’s just something to think about."~Joe Barton

"In the emergency room they have what’s called rape kits where a woman can get cleaned out" - Texas state Rep. Jodie Laubenberg

"These Planned Parenthood women, the Code Pink women, and all of these women have been neutering American men and bringing us to the point of this incredible weakness...We are not going to have our men become subservient." — Rep. Allen West


"I would never approach a small-breasted woman." -- President Clinton

"I don't understand how they can call me anti-Latino when I've made four movies in Mexico." -- California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger

"Do you own sombreros? Do you know the Mexican hat dance?" -- Sidney Yates, U.S. representative from Illinois, addressing Hispanic high school students

"For a century and a half now, America and Japan have formed one of the great and enduring alliances of modern times." -- President Bush, a history major

"If the King's English was good enough for Jesus, it's good enough for me." -- Miriam "Ma" Ferguson, Texas governor

"I think incest can be handled as a family matter within the family." -- Jay Dickey Jr., U.S. representative from Arkansas

"These people are just like us. They love their children and keep themselves clean." -- Paul Hardy, Louisiana gubernatorial candidate, after visiting a housing project in New Orleans
  • 21

TCS Etiquette Guide

Rules and FAQs

Zevran wrote:Magic can kill. Knives can kill. Even small children launched at great speeds can kill.
User avatar
sunglasses
TCS Moderator
TCS Moderator
 
Posts: 11527
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 2:52 pm
Show rep
Title: The Speaker of Horrors.

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby NotCIAAgent » Thu Oct 23, 2014 5:55 pm

sunglasses wrote:"I think incest can be handled as a family matter within the family." -- Jay Dickey Jr., U.S. representative from Arkansas


This is so right, at the same time is so wrong...

It is wright.
  • 14

Image
User avatar
NotCIAAgent
Knight Writer
Knight Writer
 
Posts: 2914
Joined: Wed Oct 02, 2013 3:33 am
Location: 90's, Canada Wilderness
Show rep
Title: Shitposter Extraordinaire

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby FaceTheCitizen » Thu Oct 23, 2014 5:59 pm

sunglasses wrote:"I think incest can be handled as a family matter within the family." -- Jay Dickey Jr., U.S. representative from Arkansas


Image
  • 18

"Or perhaps the distinction between the two wasn’t so fine, between the man-made monster and the man made monster."- Sylvester Lambsbridge, Twig.
User avatar
FaceTheCitizen
TCS Moderator
TCS Moderator
 
Posts: 4550
Joined: Sun Apr 14, 2013 7:12 pm
Show rep
Title: Thot Patrol

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby Aquila89 » Thu Oct 23, 2014 6:10 pm

How about Bush Sr.'s Freudian slip about Ronald Reagan?
  • 10

As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.
--Carl Jung
User avatar
Aquila89
TCS Junkie
TCS Junkie
 
Posts: 3371
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 1:45 pm
Location: Hungary
Show rep

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby Edgar Cabrera » Thu Oct 23, 2014 6:14 pm

OK, I don't know if this is technically wrong, but:

"Most Americans could not give a flying flip about a bunch of politicians in Washington. Who cares? You know, almost all of us are in cheap suits and bad haircuts." – Ted Cruz, U.S. Senator from Texas, during his 21-hour filibuster.

Well, that filibuster was more well know for his Star Wars references, among other things...

"Just like in the 'Star Wars' movies, the Empire will strike back. But at the end of the day, I think the Rebel alliance, I think the people, will prevail."

imrs.jpg
imrs.jpg (126.42 KiB) Viewed 4950 times
"Wut?"

... and I know you guys at D.C. need to keep a "gosh darn it to heck" approach to words, but a "flying flip"?

Image
  • 9

Last edited by Edgar Cabrera on Fri Oct 24, 2014 2:13 am, edited 1 time in total.
James Bond: "Red wine with fish. Well, that should have told me something."
Red Grant: "You may know the right wines, but you're the one on your knees. How does it feel, old man?"
From Russia with Love

"This woman is an idiot without a basic grasp of the English language, and the guy is an abusive creepy weirdo."
– JamesT's review of Fifty Shades of Grey.
User avatar
Edgar Cabrera
Blobber
Blobber
 
Posts: 3085
Joined: Tue May 07, 2013 4:23 pm
Location: Asunción, Paraguay
Show rep
Title: A Masked Brightener

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Thu Oct 23, 2014 8:42 pm

"Suicide in Alaska didn’t exist before “government largesse” gave residents an entitlement mentality"-Rep. Don Young (R-Alaska), speaking at a high school in his district where a student committed suicide the week before.
  • 13

Last edited by Deathclaw_Puncher on Thu Oct 23, 2014 10:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Schmibby Dibby Kabibby"- Alex Hirsch

"When in doubt, meow it out!"- Bex Taylor-Klaus
User avatar
Deathclaw_Puncher
Knight Writer
Knight Writer
 
Posts: 12189
Joined: Sun Apr 14, 2013 9:42 pm
Location: Fair Oaks, CA
Show rep
Title: Saviour of Saga

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby Tesseracts » Thu Oct 23, 2014 8:46 pm

TRIGGER WARNING: Thousand years of darkness.


I predict this thread will mostly be Republican nonsense so to be fair I found some moronic quotes from liberals.

''It depends on what the meaning of the words 'is' is.''
—Bill Clinton, during his 1998 grand jury testimony on the Monica Lewinsky affair

''I guess what I'm trying to say without boring you too long at breakfast -- and you all look dull as hell, I might add. The dullest audience I have ever spoken to. Just sitting there, staring at me. Pretend you like me!''
—Joe Biden, speaking to a group of Turkish-American and Azerbaijani-American donors, April 27, 2012

''I think that people like the Howard Sterns, the Bill O'Reillys, and to a lesser degree the bin Ladens of the world are making a horrible contribution.''
—Sean Penn

''You know, education -- if you make the most of it -- you study hard, you do your homework and you make an effort to be smart, you can do well. If you don't, you get stuck in Iraq.''
—Sen. John Kerry (D-MA), botching a joke about President Bush getting us stuck in Iraq

''My fear is that the whole island will become so overly populated that it will tip over and capsize.''
—Rep. Hank Johnson (D-Ga.) expressing concern during a congressional hearing that the presence of a large number of American soldiers might upend the island of Guam

''They don't call me Tyrannosaurus Sex for nothing.''
—Ted Kennedy
  • 17

User avatar
Tesseracts
Big Brother
Big Brother
 
Posts: 9600
Joined: Sat Apr 13, 2013 5:31 am
Show rep
Title: Social Media Expert

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby JamishT » Thu Oct 23, 2014 9:24 pm

"...and then we're going to Washington D.C. to take back the White House! BRAAAAH! --Howard Dean

"Look, John's last-minute economic plan does nothing to tackle the number-one job facing the middle class, and it happens to be, as Barack says, a three-letter word: jobs. J-O-B-S, jobs." --Joe Biden
  • 12

JamishT was a heck of a guy,
With a devilish twinkle in his eye.
With his hand-picked flowers,
And his feel-good powers,
He made all the girls blush and sigh.
User avatar
JamishT
TCS ModerBlobber
TCS ModerBlobber
 
Posts: 5374
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 4:31 pm
Location: KC, MO, AMERICA
Show rep
Title: The Wannabe Adult

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby iMURDAu » Fri Oct 24, 2014 3:42 am

How. Am I supposed to sleep with the Dean Scream stuck in my head now. Dammit. :D

Ohio Governor John Kasich - "Very rarely do I read a newspaper. Because … reading newspapers does not give you an uplifting experience. … I have found my life is a lot better if I don’t get aggravated by what I read in the newspaper."

Al Gore's best quote ever - "During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet."

President Clinton - "African Americans watch the same news at night that ordinary Americans do."

Former D.C. Mayor Marion Barry - "If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very very low crime rate."

Former V.P. Dan Quayle - "Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."
  • 17

“This is going to become a bad meme,” Todd observed.
User avatar
iMURDAu
TCS Chomper
TCS Chomper
 
Posts: 6352
Joined: Fri Apr 19, 2013 10:08 am
Location: Route 11 by Scoopalicious
Show rep
Title: King of Fuh

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby Aquila89 » Fri Oct 24, 2014 10:13 am

iMURDAu wrote:Al Gore's best quote ever - "During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet."


What's wrong with that? Internet pioneers Bob Kahn and Vint Cerf have said this about that statement:

Last year the Vice President made a straightforward statement on his role. He said: "During my service in the United States Congress I took the initiative in creating the Internet." We don't think, as some people have argued, that Gore intended to claim he "invented" the Internet. Moreover, there is no question in our minds that while serving as Senator, Gore's initiatives had a significant and beneficial effect on the still-evolving Internet. The fact of the matter is that Gore was talking about and promoting the Internet long before most people were listening.


Tesseracts wrote:''They don't call me Tyrannosaurus Sex for nothing.''
—Ted Kennedy


He said that at a Christmas party, where he dressed up as Barney the Dinosaur, and his wife as "one of the dinosaur's very young admirers". No doubt, that's stupid, but it isn't really political, is it?
  • 6

As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.
--Carl Jung
User avatar
Aquila89
TCS Junkie
TCS Junkie
 
Posts: 3371
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 1:45 pm
Location: Hungary
Show rep

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby iMURDAu » Fri Oct 24, 2014 1:21 pm

If you've got Ted Kennedy's public track record, yes it is political. Plus that happened about a year after Bob Packwood's issues came to public light and were still in the news so to hear a Senator joking about sexual harassment... shit I'm going to say it..... rubbed people the wrong way.

As for Al Gore's quote I'd like to point out that its impossible for anyone to do anything alone, solo, or by themselves in Congress. It came off like he was taking credit for jumpstarting the idea of the internet. Even the people you quoted said that he was promoting it but Gore still said "I took the initiative in creating the internet". It was a gaffe.
  • 1

“This is going to become a bad meme,” Todd observed.
User avatar
iMURDAu
TCS Chomper
TCS Chomper
 
Posts: 6352
Joined: Fri Apr 19, 2013 10:08 am
Location: Route 11 by Scoopalicious
Show rep
Title: King of Fuh

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby Tesseracts » Fri Oct 24, 2014 2:40 pm

Aquila89 wrote:He said that at a Christmas party, where he dressed up as Barney the Dinosaur, and his wife as "one of the dinosaur's very young admirers". No doubt, that's stupid, but it isn't really political, is it?

I don't know? I'm not posting it because it's political, I'm posting it because I found it amusing.
iMURDAu wrote:As for Al Gore's quote I'd like to point out that its impossible for anyone to do anything alone, solo, or by themselves in Congress. It came off like he was taking credit for jumpstarting the idea of the internet. Even the people you quoted said that he was promoting it but Gore still said "I took the initiative in creating the internet". It was a gaffe.

I feel bad for Al Gore, I think his quote was taken way out of context. I don't think he was taking credit for the creation of the internet at all. He was only saying he played a role in the creation of the internet, which is unusually forward-thinking for a politician, and that's something he should be able to brag about without his statements being nitpicked. Basically I'm with Snopes on this one.

But you know what, context ruins everything, so as this Al Gore quote looks douchey out of context it still belongs on this thread.
  • 6

User avatar
Tesseracts
Big Brother
Big Brother
 
Posts: 9600
Joined: Sat Apr 13, 2013 5:31 am
Show rep
Title: Social Media Expert

Re: Politicians say the darndest things

Postby Aquila89 » Fri Oct 24, 2014 2:43 pm

I'm posting it because I found it amusing.


Well, Kennedy was trying to be amusing, unlike most of the other people in this thread.

to hear a Senator joking about sexual harassment... shit I'm going to say it..... rubbed people the wrong way.


Based on the article, it's my understanding that Kennedy said that to his wife, so it's not exactly harassment...
  • 1

As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.
--Carl Jung
User avatar
Aquila89
TCS Junkie
TCS Junkie
 
Posts: 3371
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 1:45 pm
Location: Hungary
Show rep

Next

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests