What Would Trump Say?

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What Would Trump Say?

Postby blehblah » Mon Nov 23, 2015 10:47 pm

Instead of letting Trump lead the news, let's get in-front of the Donald.

Gear it to a news story (there is a related thread on the real-unreality of Trump) before Trump reacts, or gear it to something that isn't news, but Trump might react to.

For example:

Probably Donald Trump tomorrow wrote:I have been hearing a lot about global warming, and it sounds like a bad deal. The penguins and bears from Greenland or Alaska or other places might complain because they have a tough time, but that is part of a natural cycle, like bankruptcy. We are having a tough time not for those seals and animals, we are having a tough time because of our leaders, and they are stupid, because penguins and strong bears want to move here, and steal our iceboxes!

Ice-is ours! Ice-is American! Ice-is freedom!

Everyone, we can blow it up! Ice-is, Ice-is!
.
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Re: What Would Trump Say?

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Mon Nov 23, 2015 10:51 pm

Donald Trump (probably) wrote:Although the nation is on tenterhooks following the terrorist attacks in Paris earlier this month, 150 passengers arriving at Kennedy Airport from Mexico on Friday were able to leave the airport without going through customs.
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Re: What Would Trump Say?

Postby iMURDAu » Tue Nov 24, 2015 1:49 am

The Donald wrote:They're sneaky. They've been sneaky for longer than most of us have been paying attention? Did you even realize that Louis C.K. is part Mexican? His father worked for their government as recently as 2003. Now you'd think a redheaded guy coming out of the Boston comedy scene would probably be Irish, maybe Jewish. Nope, boom, Mexican. And we just let his family come back to the United States. Probably because we didn't have enough border patrol to say "hey that redheaded kid is speaking Spanish" and put a stop to it.


Make America Grape Crush Again wrote:Sweetest Day? What's that? Another Valentine's Day? Don't get me wrong. I'm all about love. But this is just another ploy to get me to buy candy. Not gonna happen. Anniversary, Birthday, Valentine's. No more candy than that for my wife.


Donnie Trump Card wrote:See I told you. Those Syrian refugees were all rotten and we brought garbage into our house when we let them in. Oh sure today its just one person getting charged with a misdemeanor but you know that's only because we can't catch them all at once since President Obama killed the NSA.
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Re: What Would Trump Say?

Postby SandTea » Tue Nov 24, 2015 3:38 am

Don T. will probably say wrote:I give thanks for our great American heritage that goes back 2,015 years. Ya know, Ben Franklin wanted to make the turkey the national bird but he was one of those liberals and now we eat turkeys!


Donald Trump probably will say wrote:Christmas is a time, time for, about pregnancy. That's what it's really about. I mean all these blue cups, red cup-holidays that's bologna. It's about the one pure women in the world and America deserves to have more.


edit like 15 16 to try and get it just right-

Now I really want a "what does the fox say" trump remix. Hah sorta like this I guess

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Re: What Would Trump Say?

Postby sunglasses » Tue Nov 24, 2015 3:23 pm

TheDonald wrote:I mean, have no problem with Canucks. They have maple syrup and hockey and those are very good whitebread things. But poutine?! That's just too far. That's why we should build a wall at the border. We'll call it the Trump wall. What's that? No, we aren't going to allow any crossings at the Trump wall. None. They'll just have to use ice picks and climb over because that would amuse me. Look, the real reason we need this is because I saw Canadians cheering against us when our hockey team lost. I saw it. There's video somewhere. We can't allow that mindset to hurt American interests. And by interests I mean the people in America. We can't allow them to leave. Ever. My reptilian overlords have been priming the American people for years as the perfect sustenance. Why do you really think everything has sugar in it. It makes you taste so much better.
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Re: What Would Trump Say?

Postby blehblah » Tue Nov 24, 2015 7:31 pm

Trump Probably Responds wrote:
I know Putin, and I don't mean the Communist Canuck stuff - I mean the real deal.

One of his planes got shot-down. I have looked him in the eye, really got to know him more than the idiots in power who make bad deals, and I said to myself, and I knew it was me because I heard me say "Trump", I will build at least several towers in Moscow, from which Trump Blackhawks - because I'm so friendly with the blacks and the Indians - will create trade via a better deal. Putin, whom I know better than my right hand, will back-off, because he'll see me with my deal in my right hand, and he's a man who understand that sort of hard negotiation.

I will look him in the eye, with my big Trump-American deal in my hand, and tell him, "No more Turkey stuff, Vlad," because we are bro's. He's got his country, I want mine.

Angela Merkel - is that a real person? I thought she was a contestant in the Trump Ms Universe. But, let me be serious, I think it's amazing when a country lets a woman run it. I have many, many Mexican women running kitchens all over the place, which is why I will give Hillary a special position at one of my resorts, but not Bill, he frightens me.

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