SWIM

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SWIM

Postby JamishT » Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:06 am

This is the forum version of an improv game called Sex With Me. Yes, yes, I know the acronym "SWIM" doesn't exactly work, but SWM looks lame. Anyway, it goes something like this. The person above you will say an activity, you will give a "Sex with me is like _____; ...." response.

Example:

Playing guitar.

Sex with me is like playing guitar; it involves a G-string.

Get it? Good! I fully expect most activities to have more than one way it could be compared to sex with y'all, so repeat a prompt as often as you want. I do not, however, want to see any repeat answers. Alright, person below me, your prompt is:

Gardening.
  • 23

JamishT was a heck of a guy,
With a devilish twinkle in his eye.
With his hand-picked flowers,
And his feel-good powers,
He made all the girls blush and sigh.
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Re: SWIM

Postby HarpingCarp » Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:11 am

Sex with me is like gardening, it's dirty, full of its own specialized tools and takes forever for the pay off (if at all).

Browsing the internet.
  • 29

Kate threatened me to take it down. I need an adult.

Spoiler: show
<Kateness> Carp
<Kateness> Change your damn sig.
<Kateness> Hate Week's over
<Kateness> I swear to God I'll start editing links to your indiscretion with a pirate, in everything.
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Re: SWIM

Postby AveryGlendale » Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:13 am

Sex with me is like browsing the internet. You'll likely end up with several mental scars and several worthless trinkets you spent countless amounts of money on.

Cleaning a garage.
  • 26

SQUAAAAAAK
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Re: SWIM

Postby Matthew Notch » Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:43 am

Sex with me is like cleaning a garage. It's so fun!

Wait I'm doing this wrong

Getting a large object through a small opening.
  • 22

It's Dangerous to Go Alone


"I desperately want Jiggery Pokery now."-- Pikajew

"I do feel that if she happens to favour attractive, successful, intelligent men I will be at a disadvantage."--Anglerphobe

"I have a beautiful sphincter and Mexico is gonna pay for it."--Kate
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Re: SWIM

Postby Learned Nand » Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:45 am

Sex with me is like getting a large object through a small opening; despite the erotic implications, it really ends up mostly just being frustrating and unrewarding.

Assembling the Avengers.
  • 29

Terry Pratchett wrote:The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

Click for a Limerick
OrangeEyebrows wrote:There once was a guy, Aviel,
whose arguments no one could quell.
He tested with Turing,
his circuits fried during,
and now we'll have peace for a spell.
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Re: SWIM

Postby OrangeEyebrows » Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:48 am

Sex with me is like Assembling the Avengers. It gets the fanboys worked up.

Meditation.
  • 24

A society without redemption would damn us all ~ Kate
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Re: SWIM

Postby krankittoeleven » Sun Apr 26, 2015 10:04 am

Sex with me is like Meditation, relaxing as long as you learn to control your breathing.

Doing the Laundry
  • 18

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Re: SWIM

Postby iMURDAu » Sun Apr 26, 2015 1:50 pm

Sex with me is like doing the laundry. It takes up a good portion of your day although you don't really even need to pay close attention to what you're doing and you can get away with doing it just once a week. If you don't have the proper equipment at home I'll need a lot of quarters from you. I also think its a good idea to keep whites and colors separated.

Cooking breakfast
  • 21

“This is going to become a bad meme,” Todd observed.
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Re: SWIM

Postby JamishT » Sun Apr 26, 2015 1:59 pm

Sex with me is like cooking breakfast; I do it as fast as I can.


Building with Legos
.

Side note: you can be positive about your sexual prowess or skills; that can be just as funny!
  • 18

JamishT was a heck of a guy,
With a devilish twinkle in his eye.
With his hand-picked flowers,
And his feel-good powers,
He made all the girls blush and sigh.
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Re: SWIM

Postby jbobsully11 » Sun Apr 26, 2015 2:02 pm

If the "I" came from the word "with," the acronym could be spelled "SWiM." Also that's two posts I missed replying to while writing this, and I had good ones for both of them.

Sex with me is like building with Legos; best done with some imagination.

your mom
  • 20

Crimson847 wrote:In other words, transgender-friendly privacy laws don't molest people, people molest people.

(Presumably, the only way to stop a bad guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law is a good guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law, and thus transgender-friendly privacy law rights need to be enshrined in the Constitution as well)
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Re: SWIM

Postby Learned Nand » Sun Apr 26, 2015 2:04 pm

Sex with me is like your mom; your chance of seeing either ever again disappeared a long time ago.

Erecting a Breastwork
  • 24

Terry Pratchett wrote:The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

Click for a Limerick
OrangeEyebrows wrote:There once was a guy, Aviel,
whose arguments no one could quell.
He tested with Turing,
his circuits fried during,
and now we'll have peace for a spell.
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Re: SWIM

Postby Matt the Czar » Sun Apr 26, 2015 7:21 pm

Sex with me is like erecting a breastwork: long, tedious, and you'll probably die by the end anyway. But it was funny when you heard it.

Climbing Mount Everest.
  • 16

"Operation Prepare Your Anus is considered to have been the most thoughtfully planned and masterfully executed humanitarian intervention in American history."-DTanza, alternatehistory.com

Now as a very moral person, I would never sell a pot brownie to a toddler.
I.. I would just GIVE it to them.- CMSellers.
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Re: SWIM

Postby OrangeEyebrows » Sun Apr 26, 2015 7:26 pm

Sex with me is like climbing Mount Everest. Dozens of men have died halfway up.

Making tea.
  • 21

A society without redemption would damn us all ~ Kate
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Re: SWIM

Postby SilverMaple » Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:02 pm

Sex with me is like making tea. It's hot, steamy, and full of spice, but everything is kind of soggy when all is said and done.

Churning butter.
  • 15

Bert wrote:The best part of my job is fistfighting an 8 year old every day.


//Friend come and go, like the wave in the ocean, but true ones stay like an octopus on our face.\\
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Re: SWIM

Postby FaceTheCitizen » Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:50 pm

...
  • 18

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