The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby blehblah » Sun Nov 17, 2013 11:01 pm

*cries*

This whole time, I've been doing it all wrong!

*wrings-out vodka-soaked tear-towel into a styrofoam cup*

ALL WRONG!!!!!

*guzzles briny vodka*

Agh... it's, it's not you all ya'll you... shit's me.

*looks around*

Okay, who's the ass-face who took my pee towel? Gudamnit, you may be the mayor, Ford, but you're not the bosstofme.

*Eyes an empty room*

Alright. Hmmmph. So, did I ever tell you the story of Bear Gryllz? He makes the best grylled cheese evah! I'm hungry. Where's my cheese towel, ya ingrates!?!


As a slight aside, what constitutes a "serving"? For some, "two servings" is two glasses/shots/drinks/beers. For some others... that's breakfast. No judgement here - I do get the spirit of the thread. It could give solid cover to really boundary-straining thoughts, but that's not exactly the intent. Hmmm... let me think on it whilst I wring-out my tomato-garlic towel over some lovely noodles.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby Typical Michael » Sun Nov 17, 2013 11:39 pm

To paraphrase Brendan McGinley, I think it was.

"Five drinks in less than 2 hours is binge drinking? I've had more alcoholic breakfasts."

Preach it, brother.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby blehblah » Sun Nov 17, 2013 11:54 pm

Typical Michael wrote:To paraphrase Brendan McGinley, I think it was.

"Five drinks in less than 2 hours is binge drinking? I've had more alcoholic breakfasts."

Preach it, brother.


And then there's my hopeful future liver recipient. It's all, blehblah MY liver this, blehblah, MY liver that. It's like, dude - I earned this thing in a Brazilian bathroom first, so back right the hell off, and why is your bathtub full of ice? Am I right?

I don't feel guilty, though, Douche Crosby was barely even using it.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby Australia » Mon Nov 18, 2013 3:44 am

blehblah wrote:I do get the spirit of the thread.

No puns in the cocktail lounge. You're banned from the premises for a week. Don't worry, absinthe makes the heart grow fonder.

Hey, where are you guys dragging me? What did I do?
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby DamianaRaven » Mon Nov 18, 2013 4:23 am

To the sound of Damiana singing along... so wretchedly:

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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby gregfrankenstein » Mon Nov 18, 2013 9:55 am

I made a grilled cheese sandwich with macaroni and cheese in it. Now I have a bowl of Cheese Nips.

Cheese.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby Albatross727 » Thu Nov 21, 2013 11:05 pm

Well I've had 2 pints and I feel fine tbh, I'm going out in about an hour though and before then I have a lovely bottle of whisky to get through so I'll post again in a few hours.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby OrangeEyebrows » Thu Nov 21, 2013 11:05 pm

...try not to actually die of alcohol poisoning.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby Albatross727 » Thu Nov 21, 2013 11:28 pm

OrangeEyebrows wrote:...try not to actually die of alcohol poisoning.


Orange you're British so I'm just going to say one word to you - "Newcastle".
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby Albatross727 » Fri Nov 22, 2013 4:18 am

Ok so sevryal jagero bombs and a fiw glases of whisky later I can kine type ok. but i don't klnow is this is legubale?
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby SlayerGoddess » Fri Nov 22, 2013 7:17 am

Ok, I've started drinking.

I need it after what my boyfriend told me earlier.

We had just seen Catching Fire in the theater, and he told me he preferred TWILIGHT. I wanted to check him for brain damage.

Would it be illegal for me to duct-tape him to the couch and make him watch a Buffy the Vampire Slayer marathon? Hypothetically speaking, of course *wink wink*
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby LaoWai » Fri Nov 22, 2013 8:34 am

SlayerGoddess wrote:Would it be illegal for me to duct-tape him to the couch and make him watch a Buffy the Vampire Slayer marathon? Hypothetically speaking, of course *wink wink*

Hypothetically speaking, the legality of such an action would be questionable. The hilarity of such an action would be unquestionable, however, so there's that.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby Albatross727 » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:31 am

OK I'm not sure if this counts because despite still feeling drunk I now have head that I'm pretty sure has an evil agenda against me. FUCK YOU, SHEFFIELD! Good night though *pain-filled sobs*.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby Suckerfish » Sun Nov 24, 2013 9:43 am

SlayerGoddess wrote:Ok, I've started drinking.

I need it after what my boyfriend told me earlier.

We had just seen Catching Fire in the theater, and he told me he preferred TWILIGHT. I wanted to check him for brain damage.

Would it be illegal for me to duct-tape him to the couch and make him watch a Buffy the Vampire Slayer marathon? Hypothetically speaking, of course *wink wink*


Are you sure your boyfriend isn't a thirteen year old girl in disguise? Or one of those creepy middle aged ladies who has an unnaturally creepy fixation with stupid, teenage vampire faff? Wait a second...is your boyfriend Stephanie Meyer? You might want to get him checked for that. Stephanie Meyer is highly contagious and while not fatal, can cause a host of myriad and unpleasant side effects.
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Re: The Cocktail Lounge - two drink minimum, adults only

Postby SlayerGoddess » Mon Nov 25, 2013 5:05 am

Suckerfish wrote:
Are you sure your boyfriend isn't a thirteen year old girl in disguise? Or one of those creepy middle aged ladies who has an unnaturally creepy fixation with stupid, teenage vampire faff? Wait a second...is your boyfriend Stephanie Meyer? You might want to get him checked for that. Stephanie Meyer is highly contagious and while not fatal, can cause a host of myriad and unpleasant side effects.


He's definitely a man (physically, at least) and he really liked the Hunger Games last year.

Shit, he's possessed, isn't he? Would you happen to know an exorcist?
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