Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby Tesseracts » Tue Dec 20, 2016 9:04 pm

I want to be an elf.
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby sunglasses » Tue Dec 20, 2016 9:23 pm

Excellent.

*cackles*
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby jbobsully11 » Wed Dec 21, 2016 6:57 am

I just remembered this now have given this copious amounts of thought over the last few minutes days, and decided I would like to join in the festivities, to distract me from how far behind I am on my shopping for family members.

*looks at the clock*

Hopefully midnight EST wasn't the deadline.
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Crimson847 wrote:In other words, transgender-friendly privacy laws don't molest people, people molest people.

(Presumably, the only way to stop a bad guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law is a good guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law, and thus transgender-friendly privacy law rights need to be enshrined in the Constitution as well)
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby Grimstone » Wed Dec 21, 2016 12:10 pm

Image
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"The struggle itself towards the heights is enough to fill a man's heart."
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby sunglasses » Wed Dec 21, 2016 5:33 pm

jbobsully11 wrote:I just remembered this now have given this copious amounts of thought over the last few minutes days, and decided I would like to join in the festivities, to distract me from how far behind I am on my shopping for family members.

*looks at the clock*

Hopefully midnight EST wasn't the deadline.


Of course not.
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby sunglasses » Wed Dec 21, 2016 5:34 pm

sunglasses wrote:So far the assistant volunteer elves are:

1. Piter
2. Jamish
3. Greg
4. Oz
5. Maxxxxxxxx
6. Maps
7. Tess
8. Jbob
9. Grimstone

We need moar elves plz.


YOu still have time! Yes, you! You right there. BOTH HANDS ON THE KEYBOARD MISTER!
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby sunglasses » Thu Dec 22, 2016 3:33 pm

Sending out the elves assignments NOW. Let me know if you didn't get a PM.

If you join late-don't fret! Head elf Sunny can still find you work!
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby sunglasses » Fri Dec 30, 2016 10:25 pm

Head Elf Sunny is missing some gifts. But that's ok, because she's lazy too.

Please have your gifts to Head Elf Sunny before she starts drinking 5 pm EST tomorrow, 12/31/16. That way she can at least get them PM'd to everyone before the new year starts.

Well, except for you, Australia. It's not my fault you're a full blessed day ahead of us.

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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby Australia » Sat Dec 31, 2016 2:23 am

That's cool. By meme logic, the gift is bound to be better if I don't technically receive it in 2016.
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby sunglasses » Sun Jan 01, 2017 12:37 am

So Head Elf Sunny has been dealing with some not very festive and real life shit and has spent most of her day in the hospital with a friend. Kinda. Husband's friend. Mullet haver? Anyway...


Some of your gifts have been sent out. Some have not been. If you have not received one yet, FEAR NOT for Head Elf Sunny hopes to have her shit together tomorrow at the latest.

She totally promises.

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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby JamishT » Sun Jan 01, 2017 4:58 am

I got a song! A whole song! Thank you, Secret Santa!

Secret Santa whom I reckon is gregfrankenstein wrote:Merry whatever this is, JamishT! Santa finally got his act together long enough to write you this song. Please enjoy it in whatever way Amish people listen to music. I assume you stream it via conch shell.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B709YWM15j66QVRwNmZJZmpJQ3M/view?usp=sharing

And here are the lyrics:

Spoiler: show
Hey there, JamishT
Merry Christmas and/or New Year
Santa's a little askew this year but he tried to put something together
And I hope you can appreciate it

Hey there Amish guy
Posting on forum
Hilariously

It's a holiday
Well, kind of almost
Merry post-Christmas

Santa can't come on time every year
Sometimes he takes six days to appear
He wrote you a song and made it sincere
All for JamishT
Whoopee

We checked Pennsylvania
'Cause we thought you lived there
We looked under every buggy
And asked every horse and mare

We even asked the Quakers
Those oatmeal loving hacks
Santa couldn't find any place
To empty his bloated sack

We apologize
For the crazy mix-up
Christmas Eve

But we found you now
On this goddamn forum
It's called the Comment Section

Santa can't come on time every year
Sometimes he takes six days to appear
He wrote you a song and made it sincere
It's part resolutions, part Christmas cheer
The truth is that Santa lost all his deer
A lactose intolerant left him a beer
So he drove is sleigh right into next year
And wrote about JamishT

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JamishT was a heck of a guy,
With a devilish twinkle in his eye.
With his hand-picked flowers,
And his feel-good powers,
He made all the girls blush and sigh.
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby jbobsully11 » Sun Jan 01, 2017 5:16 am

I got a song from someone with a totally nondescript accent:

https://soundcloud.com/user-875233830/s ... er/s-VlJWa

Spoiler: show
The following may appear insensitive due to recent events.
However, this was planned before said events and thusly it is totally appropriate.
And now, enjoy.

*Last Christmas and gunshots* Sorry about that.
Now, let's get some balls up in this bitch!

jbobsully
Way hot, golly
Making TCS since your arrival way more jolly

Five percent Irish, a hundred percent awesome
Cross science with magic and it's you that blossoms

You chose the perfect avatar, cause like the Mandelbrot set
Your complexity gets more beautiful the deeper one's looks get

If you're down because you're jobless,
Keep in mind that the employers are the losers because hey, they are bobless

Just remember that many geniuses had a long hard way
Just keep at it and soon you'll be the richest man in NJ, USA

Keep bringing women too much chocolate and I swear that this is true
You won't ever need to grab a pussy, pussies will grab you

But what am I saying? Cause, I mean, your game
Is contantly turned up to the last part of your name

And now, without further banter,
Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and lots of love
From your Secret Santa


Thanks, Santa!
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Crimson847 wrote:In other words, transgender-friendly privacy laws don't molest people, people molest people.

(Presumably, the only way to stop a bad guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law is a good guy with a transgender-friendly privacy law, and thus transgender-friendly privacy law rights need to be enshrined in the Constitution as well)
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby Grimstone » Sun Jan 01, 2017 6:25 am

I got this nice picture:

Spoiler: show
Image

thanks, secret santa


Also, happy new year's everybody!
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Last edited by Grimstone on Sun Jan 01, 2017 11:18 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby Piter Lauchy » Sun Jan 01, 2017 1:12 pm

I got a script to the best movie ever:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B3sXwc ... dsTGc/view

Thanks, Secret Santa, you goddamn genius!

jbobsully11 wrote:I got a song from someone with a totally nondescript accent:

Fun fact: the moans at the pussy grab part were coincidental. I chose the beat for its slow tempo to match my lack of rap skillz, yo, and only while recording I noticed those. Switched a few lines around et voilà!

Grimstone, your pic doesn't show.
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The Oatmeal wrote:Live life passionately and love everyone like they are family, because Jesus is always with you. Jesus loves you seriously bigtime. He'd hug you until your eyeballs exploded out of your skull if he ever met you. He'd windsurf across oceans of dead Nazis which he personally slaughtered just to tell you that your new haircut is the bee's knees. [...]
Praise Jesus, especially when it's sunny outside because Jesus would totally be cool with you praising while you get a nice tan.
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Re: Secret Santa 2016: The Santa-ing

Postby Australia » Sun Jan 01, 2017 5:10 pm

My picture's even better than Grimstone's because mine actually exists.
magiceye.jpg
magiceye.jpg (945.86 KiB) Viewed 1639 times

Happy, I dunno, early Christmas, I guess, everyone.
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