Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

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Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby Typical Michael » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:10 am

So, cheque it out. We want you to write a bad-ass epitaph. For example, here is one I wrote for JT:

"He died as he lived. On fire."

It can be about a member, or yourself, or anything/anyone at all. Just make it awesome.

Write an epitaph for a meme, or a corporation, or a flavour of milkshake. Man, I don't care.

Winner gets a temp pink username and INSTANT 15 rep.

THE STAKES ARE HIGH.

(The contest will go on for...a couple of beards, and won't be based on rep, but on a poll at the end. The end of..whenever I feel like it. No limit on entries.)
  • 23

"Typical... Michael... is a ddddddddddddddddddddashing individual!!! *BC punches self in face*" - ButtChocolate

"I'm like Batman, but instead of helping people I'm awful." - CleverDick

"In fairness, I was the one who brought up the goats." - JamesT
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-ass Epitaph

Postby JamesT » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:12 am

For Typical Michael:
"Turns out what doesn't kill you doesn't make you stronger, it just makes it easier for death to get you the next time around."
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Say hello to my comic: Lil Oppy!

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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby Overlord Moo » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:17 am

"I told them I was sick!"
  • 13

6:54 Bert: Moo is so cool he wishes he could be someone else just so he could better understand what it is like to live in a world with Overlord Moo in it
9:46:06 PM GG If Moo goes oh my I know it means bad
<Strant> wig+wonderbra+Strant=Deeno
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby Sheepman » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:34 am

Written using extremely well fitted and polished stones: "Ha, try getting a rubbing of this you morbid bastards!"
  • 13

sunglasses wrote:Additionally, I'd like to add that I don't recommend leaving small children alone with Aviel. They may come back crying after being shown the odds that they were going to die horribly in the next 70 years.

I'm not trapped in here with you. You're trapped in here with me.
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:35 am

"Buried alive."
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby Sheepman » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:36 am

"He left this world as he entered it: Bloody, screaming, and... Well, let's just say that she didn't like it either."
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sunglasses wrote:Additionally, I'd like to add that I don't recommend leaving small children alone with Aviel. They may come back crying after being shown the odds that they were going to die horribly in the next 70 years.

I'm not trapped in here with you. You're trapped in here with me.
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby julyjack73 » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:38 am

"Here lies Julyjack."

"Here lies his enemies"
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Julyjack, your comment was sunshine from a unicorn's butthole. - Popeshaggy
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby Typical Michael » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:39 am

"Here Lies Chad. That Skydiving Accident Pretty Much Made The Location Decision For Us."
  • 17

"Typical... Michael... is a ddddddddddddddddddddashing individual!!! *BC punches self in face*" - ButtChocolate

"I'm like Batman, but instead of helping people I'm awful." - CleverDick

"In fairness, I was the one who brought up the goats." - JamesT
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby 52xMax » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:39 am

This is what TypicalMichael said to some people on IRC about the contest

"Fucking participate, or else..."


This is for all those who were never seen nor heard from again.
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"When in doubt... well, don't ask me!"
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby Typical Michael » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:40 am

52xMax wrote:This is what TypicalMichael said to some people on IRC about the contest

"Fucking participate, or else..."


This is for all those who were never seen nor heard from again.


For an entry, that's a good one.

*thousand yard stare*
  • 8

"Typical... Michael... is a ddddddddddddddddddddashing individual!!! *BC punches self in face*" - ButtChocolate

"I'm like Batman, but instead of helping people I'm awful." - CleverDick

"In fairness, I was the one who brought up the goats." - JamesT
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby CleverDick » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:41 am

Here lies CleverDick
Killed in a horrific tombstone carving inci
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Ashtherion wrote:We're not worse at drinking, we're just better at being intoxicated, so we don't have to spend so much on beer.
Suck our tiny economical dicks, white people.
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby JamesT » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:42 am

"He had an electric personality."

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Say hello to my comic: Lil Oppy!

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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby julyjack73 » Sun Sep 15, 2013 3:44 am

"Cut the red wire, they told me."
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Julyjack, your comment was sunshine from a unicorn's butthole. - Popeshaggy
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby FaceTheCitizen » Sun Sep 15, 2013 4:16 am

...
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Re: Contest: Write a Bad-Ass Epitaph

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Sun Sep 15, 2013 4:25 am

That mushroom went to the left this time.
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