The rant thread.

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Re: The rant thread.

Postby cmsellers » Thu Jan 11, 2018 6:34 pm

The trick to handling little kids is to fill your pockets with candy and small fireworks and then hand both out like, well, candy.

The kids will love you and their parents will try to minimize their exposure to you. It's a win-win.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby sunglasses » Thu Jan 11, 2018 6:45 pm

I enjoy interacting with children and they often enjoy interacting with me. I had a little girl ~ 2 years of age turn and say to me in the grocery store, "My dog likes this dog food, you should get your dog this dog food." Her parents were very amused as she didn't often talk to strangers.

I had a 4 year old think I was a little girl on a plane once, that was amusing.

Kids rather like when you wave at them or make faces (as Kate has said). This only works up to a certain age, then they just think you're odd.

Almost all kids like to talk about animals.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby JamishT » Thu Jan 11, 2018 11:58 pm

When she was like 3 or 4, I taught my niece how to say "cocaine" and "heroin".

My sister was very angry with me, so maybe don't take advice in this area from me.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby cmsellers » Fri Jan 12, 2018 2:18 am

JamishT wrote:When she was like 3 or 4, I taught my niece how to say "cocaine" and "heroin".

My sister was very angry with me, so maybe don't take advice in this area from me.

How did she know you didn't teach her how to say "heroine"? That's a nice, positive word.

But what you should really be teaching her is "methamphetamine" and "lysergic acid diethylamide." She'll be too impressed at her daughter's mad vocabulary skills to stay mad at you.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby DoglovingJim » Fri Jan 12, 2018 4:44 am

I went to a river with my dog and boxer-dog lady and her dog and an old lady came with several little kids, leaving them there as she went to go get something from her car. Disregarding any notion of stranger danger and all this pedophile nonsense I got to talking to them (didn't want anyone else to walk past and think they were alone) and quickly got them interested in our dogs. Anyway not too long later I would start letting them throw the ball into the river for my dog to catch (meanwhile I was trying to get the boxer interested in swimming by carrying him and walking into the water, and then swimming with them both). Kids were very invested in the boxer losing his fear of swimming (shouting words of encouragement) and also throwing the ball for my big black German shepherd.

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My happiest moment was when one of the little girls started giggling and asking me to let her throw the ball again and again and her older brother (must have been like 8) looked at her and said (paraphrasing) "I thought you were scared of dogs?", I made a lovely little girl lose her fear of big dogs and now she can carry that for the rest of her life.


Anyway, kids are awesome and I'd suggest you get a dog. If you dislike kids then they act as a good distraction, and you'd probably begin to start liking them too.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby emm » Fri Jan 12, 2018 6:36 pm

I quite like kids, I just can't seem to eat one all in one sitting...

Todays rant: does that author seriously expect me to print 36 friggin' pages and then meticulously tape them together, taking care to align all the bloody markers?
Whatever is wrong with paper patterns?!

edited to add: if I have to handle that stack of paper any longer there'll be bloody marks one way or the other...
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby BROWNRECLUSE » Mon Jan 15, 2018 6:35 pm

I'm staring at a letter detailing my relocation and reassignment for work.

On one hand, I'm getting a nice pay increase and my company will cover the costs of my relocation.

On the other hand, I really hate having to pack up in move, especially in the Winter time. I also hate the fact that my wife is going to have to give up her job and we're going to be leaving an area that we've actually come to like and appreciate.

This is kicking my stress into high gear.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby cmsellers » Mon Jan 15, 2018 6:47 pm

Hopefully they're not sending you back to Connecticut, at least?
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby BROWNRECLUSE » Mon Jan 15, 2018 8:06 pm

Michigan.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby JamishT » Mon Jan 15, 2018 10:59 pm

BROWNRECLUSE wrote:Michigan.


GROSS.

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Re: The rant thread.

Postby Absentia » Tue Jan 16, 2018 12:45 am

What kind of job do you have that they can just tell you you're moving? I would have assumed military except you said "my company".
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby Tesseracts » Wed Jan 17, 2018 3:15 pm

Last night was the worst night of my life. I suffered from severe vomiting and diarrhea. The most unpleasant part was that I spent a good 2 hours being extremely cold. I wore 2 sweaters, put on 2 blankets, and constantly rubbed my skin, but I couldn't get any warmer. I was covered in goosebumps, I was shivering, and my teeth were chattering. I desperately wanted to sleep but I felt like I was dying. After I threw up an amount I didn't think was possible my temperature suddenly went back to normal, and I managed to sleep about 3 hours. I called the doctor this morning and they told me there isn't much I can do except go to the ER if I get dehydrated. I don't know if it's the flu or food poisoning, but I think it's food poisoning from Qdoba. I am never eating there or Chipotle again. I'm afraid tonight will also be difficult like last night was.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby sunglasses » Wed Jan 17, 2018 10:31 pm

I'm irritated at your PCP.

They could have done a stool sample and sent it off to see if it grows salmonella, etc. If you DID have salmonella or a similar food poisoning antibiotics would be helpful. They can also give you anti-emetics.

If you have another night like last night, go to the ER. They can give you meds to stop the vomiting and run blood work.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby Tesseracts » Sat Jan 20, 2018 2:00 am

Thankfully I got over my food poisoning fast. However when I went to the doctor I got a throat culture, and it just came back as positive for strep. This means I got strep, food poisoning, and my period all on the same day.
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Re: The rant thread.

Postby DoglovingJim » Sat Jan 20, 2018 2:40 am

My life is like a fart, lets see how much worse it can get.
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