Shit Said in IRC

Discussion, in general

Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby cmsellers » Sat Aug 05, 2017 12:35 am

cmsellers - Today at 6:33 PM
I think it depends on how granular you get.
Obviously the same basic plots are ancient.

Marcuse - Today at 6:33 PM
Boy meets space laser
boy blows up space laser
becomes wizard
kills dad
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby cmsellers » Sat Aug 05, 2017 2:14 am

Tesseracts - Today at 8:02 PM
this is the facebook cover photo of the police force that is fighting knife crime
Image
they have a very crime ridden lawn to protect

Maple - Today at 8:07 PM
They're just upholding lawn and order
Got to respect our boys in bluegrass
Making sure no ones disturbing the peat
God I'm so lonely
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Australia » Sat Aug 05, 2017 1:06 pm

I hear there's a turf war brewing.
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Scari
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Tesseracts » Sun Aug 06, 2017 1:04 am

Strant - Today at 7:50 PM
The truth is always somewhere in the middle Tess
Buddah preached the middle path
Which just means watch south park
And then make fun of everyone for caring about stuff and having strong beliefs
The other 6 parts of the eightfold path is slightly tougher
For one you have to start a youtube channel and start referring to yourself as a "skeptic"
Then you have to target feminist videos to make sure you show how unbiased and not liberal you are
Then every now and then you can drop wisdom nuggets like "racism is bad"
You should then start sending unsolicited dick pics to people on social media
And then when they ban you you must tell them that censorship is wrong
And finally
You must realize the futility of actually trying to change anything, and resign to a life of smug satisfaction. Secure in the fact that you are intellectually superior to both the right and the left
After this point you will have achieved Nirvana
And you may shoot your head off with a shotgun
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Sun Aug 06, 2017 2:29 am

Marcuse - Today at 6:24 PM
"oh no, they set Professor Snape as our lecturer for The Gay"
"why do they even teach The Gay?"
"I think it's a requirement from our Hard Left government"
Strant - Today at 6:25 PM
snape walks into classroom
"Today we are going to teach you about how to catch HIV"
"Harry would you come up here so I can demonstrate"
"So generally speaking it would start with this unlovable child loving me enough to confess his live for me"
"And now he has aids"
"Class dismissed"
Strant - Today at 6:29 PM
snape casts an AIDS spell on Harry and he has AIDS for the rest of the series, otherwise everything is normals. But every fifth chapter there will be a reference to Harry's AIDS, so you don't forget
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Tesseracts » Sun Aug 06, 2017 8:21 pm

Dizzypunch - Today at 3:15 PM
if you look up "mistake" in the dictionary, you will see it being contextualised in relation to the creation of boku no pico
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby cmsellers » Mon Aug 07, 2017 9:03 pm

cmsellers - Today at 2:58 PM
One time I went to New Hampshire accidentally.
I was taking a girl to see a musical act in Brattleboro.
I'd never driven to Brattleboro myself before.
The road going to downtown curves sharply left.
I didn't know that.
So I went straight, crossed the bridge, and ended up, briefly, in New Hampshire.

Matt the Czar - Today at 2:59 PM
That's a serious accident
Did your insurance cover it, sellers?
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby cmsellers » Mon Aug 07, 2017 10:48 pm

cmsellers - Today at 4:45 PM
I'm lower-energy than Jeb Bush.

Kate - Today at 4:46 PM
Wow
So you need to rebrand as cmsellers!! to fool people.
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Tesseracts » Wed Aug 09, 2017 10:12 pm

Tesseracts: here is a list of all my flaws viewtopic.php?f=21&t=1747&start=135#p164683
godie: instead of thinking of those as flaws, think of them as welfare benefits
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Fri Aug 11, 2017 3:03 am

Ridley - Today at 7:00 PM
"oh my dick is on fire for mike pence's ADD-suffering chicken taste"
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Tesseracts » Fri Aug 11, 2017 3:13 am

Screen Shot 2017-08-10 at 10.10.17 PM.png
Screen Shot 2017-08-10 at 10.10.17 PM.png (307.59 KiB) Viewed 7537 times
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Deathclaw_Puncher » Fri Aug 11, 2017 3:21 am

And to think people don't think Chelsea Manning is a hero. :D :) ;) :( :? :P :mrgreen: :?: :roll: :twisted: ;)
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Tesseracts » Tue Aug 15, 2017 5:02 am

Maple - Today at 11:15 PM
I should go to sleep but I don't want to
Someone read me a bedtime story pls
Spoiler: show
Strant - Today at 11:16 PM
Once open a time there was a raindeer
The raindeer was born with a blue nose, which the other raindeers found quite peculiar indeed
He was not accepted, shunned and thrown out of society he wandered
But not a speck of hate filled his aching heart
For all that he wanted was to be seen as one of them all
Maple - Today at 11:18 PM
Awwww
Strant - Today at 11:18 PM
The raindeer wandered and sought. One day coming across a genie of sorts
The genie said that it usually only serves humans, but that he'd make an exception
The raindeer had never heard of that before and asked "What is a human, if you do not mind telling"
The genie told him that it was those those furless animals that lived down by the light, they were warm welcoming and accepting
Maple - Today at 11:20 PM
Oh no
Strant - Today at 11:21 PM
The reindeer thought for long, and finally he thought "Make me a human, but also a raindeer"
The genie clapped his hand and it was so
Strant - Today at 11:23 PM
The blue nosed raindeer felt his limbs contort. It was a strange feeling, although not painful. His front legs widened and his hoofs turned in hands and feet. He grew teeth like a man, but still he felt that he could go back
Strant - Today at 11:24 PM
He looked down on his hands, he was as tall as a reindeer standing up would be, and thick fur still covered him from head to toe
But confident in his ability he approached the lights, not knowing what was what
Strant - Today at 11:27 PM
The humans of the village saw some sort of animal, like a bear but with elongated limbs. Twice as tall as any man and eyes as black as the night, showing all of it's human-like teeth
Strant - Today at 11:29 PM
Quickly they assembled in groups to outnumber the beast. Pitchforks raised to dissuade the beast. Torches lit, fire will scare the beast
The reindeer saw an entire village of humans gathered to welcome him and approached
"Get back monster!" The words echoed through the air for what felt like forever before an explosion of screams, insults, and accusations were thrown. You see, the reindeer had never heard speech before, nor thought of the concept. It struck him as strange
He opened his mouth to try and explain, he was a friend and wanted to help and not a monster that wanted to fell
But his voice came out wretched and contorted, not what you would expect
As the mob approached he turned and ran, feeling betrayed and wronged
The townspeople were saved, no monster could get past their men
The reindeer ran and ran until he could no more, a pitchfork had struck him in his side and left quite the wound
He fell unconscious by a simple shack in the woods
The doctor of the story wandered out when he heard the sounds, like a wounded animal but sobbing. Nothing that he had heard before
A large thud was heard and he examined. It certainly looked human, maybe some terrible disease had struck
When the reindeer woke up he found himself on a wooden floor, pillows and blankets amassed both under and on him
Confused he looked around until he saw a sick or old looking man cooking a soup
He let out a noise and the man looked at him, unsure of what he could do "you should rest for now" he said, explaining what he had to do.
Still confused the reindeer said "but why, who are you?"
Strant - Today at 11:41 PM
"I'm a doctor, I help anyone who looks down"
"Now if I may ask you, who are you"
The reindeer looked shocked before explaining what he had been through
The doctor listened carefully and after the tale was told he weighed his words
"Well it sounds like you've been through an awful lot. If you want to you can stay, but I will need you to learn how to help in whatever way you can"
The reindeer spent a week recovering, and the soup was marvelous. The doctor thought him how to make his own and a thing or two about how to tend a wound
The reindeer mostly carried things for the doctor, for months on end. Learning how to read and how to speak pleasantly in the evenings
Although every day it seemed that the doctor was more and more frail
One day the doctor fell into a deep sleep, and would not wake up. It had happened on one of their routine errands. To one of the inhabitants of the woods
The reindeer knew the he did not know how to help, and for a day he fretted for what to do
He carried the doctor inside, wrapping him in blankets to protect from winter cold. His body was warm, it must be a fever
He took a big decision and lifted the doctor up, tracing his footsteps back to get to where he had come
He once again saw the lights in the distance and approached
The mob gathered up again "did you not have enough last time you fool." The reindeer lowered the doctor to the ground and asked for help the nicest way that he could
"That cooky old fool is not of someone that we approve" said the brave man who approached
The reindeer had had enough and lifted the man up
Maple - Today at 11:56 PM
Oooh snap
Strant - Today at 11:57 PM
He told him that the doctor was a man who helped anyone who needs, it was not up to him to approve. The least that they could do was to help him continue to move(edited)
NEW MESSAGES
Strant - Today at 11:58 PM
He looked upon the crowd and said "I see, you're monsters too. If anyone here is a true doctor please prove me wrong"
And no one stepped forward, afraid of the crowd
August 15, 2017
Strant - Today at 12:01 AM
They all knew he was right, but no one would admit. And so the monster left to live in the woods. Studying the books that the doctor had left behind and helping anyone the he happened to come by. As the years passed he gained many friends, both animal and man. And although the doctor passed, he was glad that he was his first friend
The end
I probably put too much effort into that
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby Tesseracts » Tue Aug 15, 2017 1:15 pm

Jayonnaise - Today at 7:49 AM
i woke up at 7:30 because of a fire alarm
but i was half asleep so i thought it was a nazi alarm
Sprite - Today at 7:49 AM
Thats a type of fire alarm
ThatIndo"Nesian"Guy - Today at 7:59 AM
Does the alarm go
"WE'RE UNDER ATTACK
THE WHITE RACE IS UNDER ATTACK
WE'RE UNDER ATTACK
THE WHITE RACE IS UNDER ATTACK"?(edited)
ThatIndo"Nesian"Guy - Today at 8:00 AM
If not, you have a fake nazi alarm
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Re: Shit Said in IRC

Postby cmsellers » Wed Aug 16, 2017 4:15 am

Tesseracts - Today at 10:15 PM
i should have known netflix didnt understand autism when they did an american death note movie
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