Dream Journal

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DREAM JOURNAL

Postby rickmcslick » Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:04 pm

Alright sleepyheads, let's all come together now and share some of the goofy-ass stuff our head-meat thinks up on it's own while the sandman is snuggling us. Tell us all about your best, scariest, funniest, or just plain weirdest dreams here, and we'll do our best to convince you that our expert interpretations mean you are losing your damn mind!
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby JamesT » Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:08 pm

I once had a dream where I was in a line for blow jobs and when I finally got to the lady giving them she gave me an IOU. Then I woke up angry.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby Typical Michael » Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:11 pm

I was talking about this one earlier in iRC, and I was even more creeped out about JamesT's interpretation, because I guess it actually means something.

In this dream, my whole upper pallet came out. Just, gone. In the dream, this didn't really bother me that much. I put it in my pocket and walked around, trying to mime and ask people how I could put it back in. Nobody could understand me, so I kept getting more and more worried. Carrying around my upper pallet.

Someone reminded me how the villain in Skyfall was afflicted with something similar, and had that implant.

Then someone else told me that I needed to immediately go bite a tree in order to avoid bad luck.

I will neither confirm nor deny biting a tree.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby OhJohnNo » Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:11 pm

<OhJohnNo> is this a good time to bring up my weirdest dream
<&Tesseracts> yes
<Rebo> sure
<OhJohnNo> it was in Skyrim
<OhJohnNo> I was a female character
<OhJohnNo> walking along in a dungeon
<OhJohnNo> mindin' my own tomb-raiding business
<Rebo> you are a guy IRL right
<OhJohnNo> when I saw a giant spider walking towards me
<OhJohnNo> (yes)
<OhJohnNo> (and in Skyrim actually)
<OhJohnNo> it didn't look much like the Skyrim giant spiders
<OhJohnNo> in fact I didn't get much of a good mental image of it
<OhJohnNo> anyway then fade to black
<OhJohnNo> cut to spider rolling over side to me
<OhJohnNo> me all bound up
<OhJohnNo> I have the weirdest orgasm of my life
<OhJohnNo> then wake up
<OhJohnNo> and realised I just came to being raped by a giant spider, essentially
<OhJohnNo> felt so odd
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby rickmcslick » Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:21 pm

Setting: Bayside High, late afternoon, on a school night.

ENTER Rick and Zack Morris, the teen heartthrob. Fuck Screech and A.C Slater, they aren't in this dream. Kelly Kapowski is welcome to show up anytime though. Anyway, Zack and I are discussing the recent influx of drug overdoses in our rad little community. Zack tells me that his kid brother (not canon, stfu, it's subconscious fanfic) has been caught with baggies of high-quality cocaine twice in the past week now. We decide to follow him after school to see if we can find out where he's been scoring, and maybe we can do something about this scourge.

After a few hours of hanging outside the Kwik-E-Mart (slashfic, fuck it), Baby Morris finally shows up. We quickly duck behind a dumpster as he looks around furtively and slips around the back of the building. We creep ever so gingerly behind, stifled breaths allowing us to overhear the illicit exchange taking place.

"Wow man, this is some messed up stuff," Zack says, freezing time to give us a chance to hold a discussion. "We need to do something about this."
"I agree," I reply, "But these humps on the street aren't the problem. We need to go to the top and bring this criminal empire crashing down amongst the ruins of the lives of all those we held dear!"

So, anyway, ZM and myself, we decide to approach the dealers, hoping to infiltrate their scheme. Using the money we got from the bake sale (unrelated dream), we decide to purchase some of their product, knowing it is the only way to gain their trust.

"Well, go ahead. Try it out," sneers Dealer A, with his Fred-Durstian Kanga hat pulled low, almost down to his thin, spotty mustache. Zack and I glance at each other, and he takes out his Blockbuster card and starts drawing out some lines for us while I slip back into the convenience store to grab a Slurpee straw. Once the party favors are in place, I throw rock while Zack throws scissors to go first.

Alright here goes nothing....

Wow, this doesn't seem like regular cocaine...

"No man, that's meth," Dealer B interjects straight into my thoughts.

Oh. Well, that's not good.

The rest of the night involves Super Rick and his Buddy Zack mentally and physically abusing the bottom level dealers, working our way up to the top in an orgy of blood and spilled confessions. Sadly, I awoke just before the final showdown with the drug-kingpin. If anyone is a good lucid dreamer and wants to finish this quest for me, I would love to hear about it.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby Ganymede314 » Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:25 pm

I once had a dream where my feet were severed, and when I went to bed in the dream I put them beside the bed like slippers, and when I woke up in the dream I spent what felt like ages binding my feet onto my ankles so I could walk. The strange thing was it felt totally normal, I wasn't freaking out at all about my severed feet. Aw dreams, you crazy.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby ButtChocolate » Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:37 pm

It's not a dream, but I occasionally suffer from sleep-paralysis (I've had hands clutching at my feet through the window at the foot of my bed, and figures standing over me that suddenly vanish.) I know none of it is real and realize it is merely a side effect of the salami-sandwich and leftover 3-month old holiday candy I shouldn't have eaten at 11:37 PM, but still- nothing is more terrifying than being awake with your eyes open and trying to scream at full lung capacity, only to hear yourself belt out a muffled "hhhrrrrrrmmmmmmmm." while at that moment something shapeless is fucking around in your peripheral vision. You hope it's just the cat drinking your water on the nightstand again, and NOT some stupid fucking extraterrestrial looking for some latenight assplay, but when you're in the thick of it, it's all very, VERY real.

Also- why the HELL is my wife just laying there while I weakly try to lift my arm to fight off my alien-cat-attacker, only to have it go all floppy and land on my crotch?!? Does she just think I'm masturbating, or...? Each time she just snores right through it until I finally break free of the paralysis and sit up straight in bed while my muffled scream goes full volume "hhhhhhrrrrrrmmmmmMMMMAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!" Seriously- this has happened at least 3 times in her presence and each time she looks at me like I'M some sort of imbecile, and then jokes in the morning "Boogeyman keep you up again last night?". I'm obviously going through some shit here: save me woman! Either stop buying so much lunchmeat so I don't feel compelled to finish it before it goes bad on a latenight sandwich binge, or at least flip a fucking pillow at the cat and end my torment. Maybe she needs some sort of incentive to help me. Something that affects HER equally, so she HAS to come to my aid before shit gets serious for me. Hmmmmmmm. ...I think I'm going to have to wet the bed one of these nights.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby Kate » Wed Apr 24, 2013 7:51 pm

I had a nightmare about the robot apocalypse. It happened while I was at a mall with my husband and we ended up getting separated because I broke off from him to duck into a store that seemed to be safe, but when it got raided by robots I went to find him again and couldn't. I managed to escape with the mall's underground rail system that I thought would get me out of the mall to safety so I could plan on how to get him out, but it just went around under the mall (what mall doesn't have an underground rail system?). I managed to crawl up somewhere to sleep.

This was a dream complete with a waking up and saying, "Oh thank God it was only a dream," because I woke up in what I thought was our bedroom but it was just a bedroom under the mall (naturally) and when I went into a room there was a cleaning robot so I hid in the bathroom and stood on top of the toilet so it wouldn't see me, but then a robot man saw me (like a Borg but handsome; also he looked like Prince Humperdink because who knows) and pulled me out and dragged me back up to the mall full of prisoners and I woke up for real before I could go looking for my husband again. I was sure he was alive and I was relieved that the robot hadn't killed me because it meant I could find him and we could escape somehow, there had to be a way. I also intuitively knew that this mall was ground zero for the robot takeover, and if I could get out and warn the world, it could be stopped.

But I cared more about my husband living than saving the world, so I guess, screw you guys if I ever have to choose between him or world peace.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby LaoWai » Wed Apr 24, 2013 9:20 pm

I have a recurring dream in which I am a cabbage. That's it; there's nothing terrifying. I am just a cabbage, thinking cabbage thoughts, none of which involve, say, cole slaw, or bubble and squeak or calconnon. I am just a cabbage, but I have this huge existential burden laid upon me of figuring out just what sort of cabbage I am meant to be. Am I meant merely to grow, or should I be doing something greater on behalf of cabbage-kind? In the dream, my thinking takes the form of many basically similar but slightly different layers. I wake up feeling discombobulated every time.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby Typical Michael » Wed Apr 24, 2013 9:22 pm

Probably the best thing a cabbage can hope to become is delicious kimchi.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby LaoWai » Wed Apr 24, 2013 9:59 pm

Kimchi vs. 川式泡菜 (Sichuan-style "soaked "cabbage)...which somewhat smelly, vinegary, slightly fermented, spicy cabbage stuff is the best? TM, we could go back and forth on this all day. How about we say, "Thank heavens for the Columbian Exchange and its peppers," and go about our business?

(Btw, did I use the word of the day or something? I got shut down by notifications and had to reboot my computer.)
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby OrangeEyebrows » Wed Apr 24, 2013 10:04 pm

Personally, I literally thumbed you up because you used the word "discombobulated". So maybe.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby Peryite » Wed Apr 24, 2013 10:30 pm

I always dream really weird stuff. Let's see. I had a dream once about these three guys. They lived in a red brick apartment by a train track and one day, they were sitting on the steps while these humans moved in. One of them turned into a really pretty silver and blue superball and rolled into the house to spy on the family, but the daughter found the ball and put it in the flowerbox outside her window. So the other two went upstairs to this old woman, the mushroom grandmother, and she told them to go upstairs to the Creeper, who lived in the attic. And he stuck hid head out the window and this huge vine sprouted from his mouth and crawled down the wall to the flower box, and rescued the superball. Then the guy changed back and the mushroom grandmother made him clean up around the house as a punishment for being so stupid as to almost get caught by the neighbors.

Then a couple of days ago I dreamed I was trying to put on makeup, but my face had cross hatching instead of ordinary shadows, there were little grooves in my skin. It was really annoying because the makeup would get stuck in them.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby LaoWai » Wed Apr 24, 2013 10:39 pm

OrangeEyebrows wrote:Personally, I literally thumbed you up because you used the word "discombobulated". So maybe.


If only we could find a champion to turn this into a forum-wide game, say, some sort of big, rocky guy who's still sensitive and a bit intellectual and classy, "Word of the Day" could be a cool game. Such a commentator would have to figure out a way to control trolls, though. I'm not clever enough for that.
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Re: DREAM JOURNAL

Postby JamesT » Wed Apr 24, 2013 11:12 pm

I once had a dream where I was milling around doing nothing and then suddenly I was awake and I was like "okay I got to get ready for school." But things felt off and I realized I was still dreaming so I woke up again, to get ready for school again. But things were still off and I was still dreaming so I woke up AGAIN and I realized it was Sunday and I didn't have to get up till later so I just lay in bed for a while. But things STILL felt off and it turns out I was still asleep.

I think that I woke up for good after that but it screwed with my mind so much I'm still not sure that I'm really awake.
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