Pretty decent start. The lobby of the GCPD is in chaos as the cops try to herd the cosplayers into cells, but people start getting loose and wreaking havoc anyway. As Bullock shouts orders and Jim solemnly stares into the middle distance, a molotov flies through the window and sets some bit of furniture alight. A clown screams that Jerome is everywhere and that tonight, Gotham will be awakened. Cue title. Please, please,
please don't let me down with this. If there is one thing --
one thing -- that
Gotham can do well, it's utter campy lunacy, and I want this lunacy to hit all the right beats now that we have Jerome on the loose.
Picking up right where we left off with Penguin, he and two guys (could've sworn he addressed three last time) storm KaneCaneCain Chemicals and are greeted by a dramatically slow-walking Nygma. Oh, dear. This is where the confrontation starts, and I have bad feelings about the resolution. Although when Ed reveals himself and takes out both of Penguin's allies, we get another gold line we've been dry on since Ed lost himself to the temptation of the Barb Side:
Ed: Did you bring anyone else?
Penguin: No, why?
Ed: *coldly draws and headshots both of the guards* Just wondering if I was going to have to reload.
But yeah, we continue on this path in earnest. Ed shows Penguin the car wreckage and screams about how Isabella was his everything, and it just... it still doesn't work. The actor sells his rage fine, but this whole thing was
never fucking earned at all from a narrative standpoint. Isabella was a magical non-entity who came into being solely to be Ed's dream girl, she clung to him for too long, and then she just died a few episodes later. We were never invested in them, we don't buy Isabella as a human being (much less as a character), and so it's impossible to see where Ed's rage comes from. This confrontation between the show's best characters, which could have been something truly special, is reduced to piddling
Batman v. Superman levels of happenstance and contrivance that I can't muster the will to give a single shit about. *heavy sigh* But let's see where it goes, shall we?
Holy shit, that escalated quickly. Gotham is now completely in flames and laughter echoes through the skyline, making it feel altogether more like a big deal than any mid-season or season finale thus far has tried to be. We're briefly treated to a purposefully vague conversation between Katherine and the mysterious ring-wearing man from "Red Queen" as they overlook the chaos; Katherine suggests that they intervene and derides the faith he places in "him" (Jim, presumably), but the man tells her that the city will bend long before it breaks, and that's that.
At the GCPD, Jim is informed of the rapidly spreading riots, and how it's both Jerome's followers and ordinary citizens who are participating in the looting and killing. Bullock angrily tells him that Penguin is missing, so nobody is in charge of the city right now, and the power won't be back on until tomorrow morning at a minimum. Also, nobody's seen or heard from Jerome, and no one knows what he wants... except, Jim realizes, for Lee. And given that the last thing Jerome mentioned to Lee, and the part they highlight in the "Previously On..." bit, is about how Jerome was
this close to killing Bruce Wayne... you son of a bitch. DON'T YOU FUCKING GO BACK TO THIS FUCKING PLOT LINE, HELLER! YOU'D BETTER FUCKING NOT!
NO MORE ENDLESS RECYCLING! NOT HERE! NOT NOW!The confrontation tragically continues as we find Ed binding Penguin to the hood of Isabella's car, right underneath a trap that's part
Saw and part Golden Age camp in a way I can't decide if I love or hate: a chain is held in place by a slowly melting block of ice, which will eventually lead to a vat of acid dumping onto Penguin and melting him to death. Ed angrily recounts every step of how he tricked Oswald into going along with his plan, and I have to credit the actor for this: when Ed growls, it sounds
demonic. Like, echoey and earthy and powerful in a way I didn't know someone so scrawny could be. Could be post-production, but I'd prefer to believe it's just talent. Anywho, Ed angrily reprimands Penguin for suggesting that he killed Isabella out of love, intones that he cannot truly love because he would sell anyone out to save his own life, and growls a goodbye to Penguin and leaves him thrashing there, making the same mistake Maroni did when he tried to kill Penguin with a car crusher: he's not sticking around to see the results, and an escape will inevitably ensue.
YUP YUP YUP WE'RE BACK TO THIS SHIT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. Jim has another encounter with the all-too-snide Lee, who eventually relents and remembers that Jerome wanted to kill Bruce. Jim has her call Alfred right away as he hurries off. Now, there's a slim chance this might be a fake-out, given we're so early into the episode... but if it's played straight, this will be yet another instance of the show wasting a great setup on a simple quest to kill the one character we know for a fact can't be killed. Please tell me it's a fake-out. Please tell me that for once in his miserable life, this hack fucker is being clever.
... We come to Bruce and Alfred trying to find candles for the power outage, and the phone rings. Alfred goes to answer it, pauses ominously, and seems to be listening to something. Then... he's bashed over the head by a clown as he tries to draw his gun, and more clowns appear from the shadows as Jerome strides in, croak-laughing and doing his best strut. The clowns surround him. Jerome taunts him. We're doing
this again. We're doing this
again. We're. Doing. This. Again. Because. There. Are. No. New. Stories. killemall1989iamtrashmanworldisafuck
...
...
*sighs heavily, returns to his computer with a glass of a beverage that is absolutely not alcoholic, clicks "Play" and hesitantly resumes analysis*
Alright, at least we have Jerome. For all that
every fucking step of this well-worn process was tired by the second season, Cameron Monaghan greases the wheels a bit and has successfully kept me chuckling with all of his lines. Whether it's his grandstanding declarations, his wavy movement, or his quick and muttered "I'm aware" to Bruce's dramatic statement of his name and importance, I just love the fuck out of this sick little bastard and he's the only thing keeping me from checking out right now. So to summarize what goes on in his scene:
- He shatters the mysterious crystal owl for fun, either rendering that whole heist plot worthless or meaning that something will get revealed within it that was previously invisible.
- Bruce manages to stall for time by getting him to relocate the murder spot to somewhere more public and dramatic, which Jerome completely acknowledges is a bluff for time even as he agrees and hauls Bruce away.
- After a surprisingly heartfelt goodbye, Alfred is left to fend for himself against some rifle-wielding clowns with orders to kill him, and I genuinely don't see how he can make it out of this one.
And that's that for now.
Oh, for the love of the screenwriting gods, fuck you, Bruno Heller. As the ice block rapidly melts under the flame and starts to dribble acid between Penguin's legs (wonder whether it was intentional that the gay man is basically threatened with chemical castration before death -- this is a coupling of Bruno Heller and FOX, so it wouldn't surprise me), a
random-ass bumbling cop we've never seen before stumbles upon him and is convinced to cut him loose just in the nick of time as the acid pours down. Penguin didn't have to use his cleverness to get free, nor did Ed have a change of heart, nor was it anyone we have any familiarity with who got him out -- just some random-ass cop in the middle of an abandoned chemical factory. Fucking perfect. 10/10, well done, way to devalue every stake you've set for this episode.
And what should follow it but the swift and easy escape of the other predicament I was briefly genuinely worried about? Yep, as these four armed clowns are toying with Alfred and refusing to kill him for god-knows-how-long, Jim sticks his head around the corner and Alfred blatantly signals to him where each assailant is and what they're carrying so they can take them down together. It's all basic stuff, a couple of headshots and a gratuitous machete to the gut by Alfred to finish things off. Then they're off to rescue Bruce, and this episode... this episode...
This episode...
All right. Bruce has a hood over his head through which he can vaguely see and hear carnival sights and sounds. And when Jerome rips it off, where should he be but a demented indoor carnival/amusement park thing where his followers have captured a bunch of civilians and are now torturing and splattering them in the various attractions? This is such a demented, delightful touch that I'm not even going to question the improbable logistics of it, and I hope this setting is used for all it's worth. But alas, the plot shows its hand: Jerome delays the execution until he and Bruce have had a little fun, thus giving Jim and Alfred the perfect amount of time to storm in and do what they will do.
This episode.
Jim and Alfred are recovering at the GCPD, and Bullock pulls up a list of the locations Jerome's men have completely taken over, the last of which is a boardwalk circus that fits the description we just saw. Jim remembers that Jerome was raised in a circus (I'd almost forgotten how shitty Jerome's origins were), and they decide to mobilize the strike team to that location.
Cut back to the circus, where Bruce is enduring the horrible, agonizing torture of... having his face painted like a sad clown. Jerome almost spices things up by suggesting the carving of a smile into Bruce's face, but instead he flips his dagger around, viciously guts a clown standing next to him ('cause villains who murder their own henchman are EXTRA SCARY) and using the blood to paint a frown on Bruce's face. The horror.
Penguin storms back into his manor to order his men to find Ed, only to be ambushed by Butch and Tabby, who state that all of his soldiers and supporters cleared out. Some terrible exchanges ensue, including Tabitha FINALLY reminding everyone that she killed Penguin's mother (which he has a shockingly muted reaction to -- not even tranquil fury, just the facial equivalent of a shrug while he suffocates on her whip), and they decide they can't kill him until Nygma's dead. So Butch pistol-whips him, and they carry him off to surely shittier pastures.
Once more unto the circus, we find Jerome forcing Bruce to watch as he tries to dunk a man into a tank of piranhas. While he winds up and taunts Bruce, he delivers what's basically the
Killing Joke "one bad day" speech mixed with that bit in
Fight Club when Tyler Durden lists off the mundane occupations who make up his ranks to the guy he almost castrates. Bruce is helpless... until he tries to distract Jerome by insisting that there are good people in Gotham who will stop his maniacs, and Jerome responds thusly:
"Gotham has no heroes."
And
god-fucking-damn it all, the
Dark Knight-esque horn score swells as Bruce gets a determined look in his eye and gazes upon his future nemesis. Now in full Batbaby mode, he breaks from a clown's grip and shoves Jerome as he tries to throw, causing him to miss the shot. Jerome manually dunks the guy anyway and smiles as Bruce screams into the reddening water, but he decides he'd better take Bruce up on the offer to kill him instead of anyone else and takes off his carny hat to prepare. A bit of his face is falling off, so he clumsily staples it back on, and when Bruce mockingly asks him if it hurts... Jerome responds by putting three staples in Bruce's arm, progressively further up the wrist until even Bruce's pain resistance training can't stop him from breaking down and submitting to being dragged away. That was a bit more hardcore than I expected, and I guess that's the closest thing I'll get to Bruce being meaningfully affected by this experience.
Jim, Bullock, and Alfred pull up in front of the circus, but it turns out all of their backup was conveniently waylaid by another riot on the way. Nevertheless, they get out and prepare to rescue Bruce, because that's how it's done on this show. Inside, Jerome has found time to dress up as a ringmaster and set up a lovely little circus pit for Bruce to be executed in. How will he be executed? Tied to a pole, he has a cannon rolled over to him that will fire a cannonball, some swords, and other unpleasant trinkets point-blank into his face when it goes off. A messy way to go, sure, but also one I can already visualize being prevented. It's just a waiting game now. And bizarrely, the episode's barely half over -- what more could there be?
Well, we get to Jim and company coming in, and they conveniently get word that the strike team has just arrived, so they don't have to put forth any actual effort by themselves! Jim fires his gun into the air as he is wont to do, and the circus turns into a huge riot as the gun-wielding riot cops storm in to break everything up. In the chaos, Jerome manages to light the cannon's fuse before escaping, and nobody is near enough to help without getting pummeled by the many clowns who have yet to be gunned down. What does Bruce do? He messily rips two staples out of his arm and uses them to pick his handcuffs, falling to the ground just as the cannon fires and obliterates the pole. Yet when Jim looks over, Bruce is just... gone. Vanished in the span of a second. Where the hell...?
Brief cut to Penguin being brought before Her Majesty Barbara Kean, Queen of Bullshit, Mother of Aneurysms, First of Her Name, long may she reign. It's an awful scene in which the bad acting, awful hammy camp, and various mannerisms that annoy me about her are all on full display, and she exerts dominance over the character who used to be my very favorite. It's established that if Penguin helps Barb, Tabby, and Butch find Ed, things will go better for him, whereas if he doesn't, he will die. I'm guessing this deal is supposed to tie back to what Ed told him earlier about him being willing to sell anyone out for his own gain, so we'll see how that ends up playing out. My guess is that it will be very similar to Tabitha letting Ed chop her hand off to protect Butch, and Ed might see the error of his ways when Penguin lets himself almost get killed. But we'll see.
Where else would Jerome catch sight of Bruce entering and pursue him than a house of mirrors? In here, there's actually briefly some impressive cinematography as Jerome stalks into a multi-mirror reflective chamber, but it's a sequence that's all too short and ends rather anticlimactically. Bruce menacingly approaches with his reflection on all sides, Jerome panicking and firing at a mirror instead of his true target, and it turns out Bruce intentionally lured him in here to make him pay for what he's done. It might be fun to see Bruce finally channel Batman, but he's still got that stupid clown makeup on and it's impossible to be remotely invested.
Back to the Penguin v. Barb confrontation, and a heaping helping of unfortunate implications about homosexuality to go with it. Penguin refuses to call Ed and find him for the terrible trio, and he goes on a rambling monologue about how he didn't truly love Ed before, which can be summed up with the idea that the show's sole gay male character only ever thought he loved Ed because he needed to be coddled and saw a replacement for Mommy's affection. Eeeeeuuuugh. But apparently he's ready for real love now, and just like I predicted, he refuses to give up Ed's location under penalty of an agonizing death. Thus, Ed comes out to pop the bubble and reveal that he was in it together with them, but that he now doesn't know what to think because he expected Penguin to sell him out. Yep yep yep, all according to my foretold plan.
Time for the big funhouse showdown! Not all that much to say about most of it; Jerome stalks around and occasionally shoots fleeing reflections of Bruce, and then when he challenges Bruce to a fistfight, Bruce tackles him from behind, engages in a little Batbaby fistfight, and violently beats him on the ground. The beating he gives is
nasty, with Jerome's face slowly yellowing and coming off, blood sloughing out, the exposed flesh burning red with every punch, and Jerome laughing all the way. But it can only end one way: Bruce stops his beating long enough to grab a mirror shard off the floor and raise it above his head, ready to put Jerome down for good... and then he sees himself in the mirror, bad clown makeup and all. GET IT BECAUSE HE NOW FEARS BECOMING THE JOKER. He drops the shard and leaves Jerome giggling madly on the floor with a half-shredded face, silently vowing to never kill anyone I guess. And thus, the rivalry is formed.
In all honestly, it's not a bad showdown. Just ridiculously on-the-nose.
Following his little epiphany, he runs outside and is greeted by Alfred, whom he thought was dead. There's a tender little reunion scene that's actually somewhat nice... until Jerome stumbles out, his face still bloody and partly hanging off, wielding the mirror shard. Jim happens to run up at that moment and strikes Jerome across the face, ripping out half of the staples and sloughing off the face enough that it's hanging eerily, distracting him almost enough for Jerome to kill him. Then he swings home again and knocks Jerome's face clean off, landing it in a puddle where it just might be destroyed by the moisture. Faceless Jerome gives us a clear look at his damage, which is slightly better than the last episode's rendition if still not that good, and then passes out as Jim looks solemnly on.
As the sun rises, we get a brief check-in with Jim and Bullock at the GCPD essentially summarizing the damage and reporting that Jerome will -- of course -- be sent to Arkham as soon as his face is reattached. As Bullock tries to cheer him up, Jim sees Lee staring at him and huffily walking away, and goes off after her.
Then we have
this scene. The Batman scene, basically. Bruce confesses that it felt good almost killing Jerome, like justice would have been done, and Alfred motivates him and assures him that he can control himself with a set of rules, "no killing" being the first one. As the music swells, Bruce repeats "I will not kill", and Alfred tells him that they'll have to get to work on putting those rules and all of his training to some use. It took a lot of constraining and not-quite-logical character arcs, but Bruce Wayne is finally Batman. At least, he's the Bruce Wayne that Batman uses as a disguise. At the age of... fifteen, generously, if Selina's age is to be trusted. Hurk. Ugh. Guh.
Cut to Katherine discussing something with someone out of shot, and... holy shit guys.
MOTHERFUCKIN' SALTY BOBBY HAS RETURNED! SALTY BOBBY COMETH! THE SECOND COMING OF SALTY BOBBY IS HERE! He's being dressed up (they trimmed his surfer hair, those rat bastards) and told he'll be able to help save Gotham somehow. The mysterious man with the Gordon family ring reinforces this. End scene.
Then we cut to Jim's apartment, as he's preparing to drown his sorrows (great minds think alike) when suddenly there's a knock at his door. Is it Lee, coming to make up and bang him? Is it Valerie Vale, proving she wasn't just a prop? Nope -- it's the mysterious ring man, whom Jim promptly identifies as his uncle Frank. DUN DUN DUN!
At the very end, we have Penguin pleading Ed not to kill him. Ed is holding a gun to him at what looks like the same dock where Jim originally tried to banish him from Gotham, and it doesn't look like things are going great for Ozzy's chances. Ever the self-sabotager, he tries to convince Ed that they love each other by launching into a frothing rant about how "I CREATED YOU" and such. And Ed... he can't be convinced, even though Penguin had previously proven himself capable of sacrifice. He loved Isabella,
somehow, and that's still enough for him to... to... shoot Penguin in the gut and push him off into the water, where we see the last shot of him sinking into the depths with his mouth open in a "not holding breath" position. Which, if he'd really wanted to, he could have done in the first place. Motherfucker.
Do I actually think Penguin is dead? Don't know. On the one hand, he's a popular character, and it's
Gotham, so even if he is dead there's a chance he'll be brought back to life somehow. On the other hand, the way the character has been so steadily humiliated, turned into a dumbass, and shunted off after coming to terms with his sexuality reeks of "Bury Your Gays," possibly even a mandate from FOX that he had to die. So anything could happen. If this
is the final death of the character who was once my favorite and not just an amateurish cliffhanger, I don't feel much of anything. I'm not sad, or angry, or in shock. And I'm also not opposed to the idea of Penguin dying, or even of Ed ultimately killing him -- that could make for a fantastic story in the right hands. I'm just kind of vaguely, head-shakingly irritated by the circumstances of it, and all of the ridiculous contrivances and logic leaps it took to artificially force these characters to this conclusion.
If this is the end, then goodbye, Oswald. We had some good times, and you were one of the few bright spots in the darkness. And now you might be gone, and I'm... vaguely annoyed.
C'est la vie.